Vegan Donuts, Lebanese Tacos, and Oysters Galore

by EverOut Staff

Oysters reign supreme in the Seattle food scene this week, as local culinary heavyweights Tom Douglas and Brendan McGill debut new oyster bars and the L’Oursin sibling Bar Bayonne introduces a daily oyster happy hour. Plus, Dough Joy and Situ Tacos launch brick-and-mortars in Ballard and the team behind Ba Sa brings their new restaurant Ramie to Capitol Hill.
NEW OPENINGS AND RETURNS

Dough Joy
Psst: A little birdie told us that the popular queer-owned vegan doughnut shop and espresso bar opened its new location in the former space of Cupcake Royale‘s Ballard outpost today. 
Ballard

The Stranger

The City wants to draw a nudity DMZ at the parking lot.

by Vivian McCall

The battle for Denny Blaine continued at a sometimes contentious public meeting at the Seattle Department of Parks and Recreation headquarters Thursday evening. 

The department, which last year announced a wildly unpopular, millionaire-funded plan to construct a children’s playground on the grassy area overlooking the shore of a historically queer nude beach, has been meeting jointly with neighbors and activists who have organized a Friends of Denny Blaine Park group with The Seattle Parks Foundation. They all met to reach an agreement hoping to end years of conflict over the beach.

Their solution? Supplementary use guidelines for Denny Blaine that make clear nudity, which is already legal in Seattle, is allowed at the park, with a compromise that establishes locations where the City would request park users wear clothing or a towel “out of consideration for the surrounding neighborhood.” 

If adopted, the City would draw a nudity DMZ at the parking lot and divide the park into two zones: A naked Zone A, composed of the grassy area and beach, and a clothed Zone B, consisting of the loop of road, E. Denny Blaine Pl., outside the park where several neighbors live. The City is taking public comment on the policy until June 6.

Those in attendance didn’t like the idea of a clothed Zone B, at all.

“This Is an Entirely Made-up Problem.”

At the end of the meeting, which went 40 minutes over schedule, Friends of Denny Blaine co-lead organizer Colleen Kimseylove asked anyone in favor of Zone B to raise their hands. Only two hands shot up. When Kimseylove asked those against Zone B to do the same, the other 40 or so people in the room raised their hands.

“That was very clear data,” Kimseylove said. Earlier in the meeting, they asked the crowd to ask themselves if this “concession” was worth making peaceful relations with the neighbors possible. 

Justin Hellier, a strategic policy advisor for Seattle Parks and Recreation, began Thursday’s meeting thanking the crowd for being there, despite any community trust lost with Parks over the playground plan.

Hellier said Parks was hoping to find a balance that works “for everyone.” Hellier said earlier that week Parks held a separate listening session with neighbors who felt intimidated at the December meetings. At the negotiation table, both sides agreed a forum for both groups would be unproductive.

Greg Shields questioned why they’d known about this meeting and not the other. Hellier answered that the neighbors and activists were both given meeting times and took different approaches. Friends of Denny Blaine posted the meeting details publicly, and the neighbors kept theirs private.

Others questioned the need for the guidelines when the law already protected their right to be naked at Denny Blaine. 

Nudity has been legal in Seattle since the 1990s; although the City doesn’t believe nudity is allowed anywhere and anyplace in Seattle, Park and police couldn’t enforce clothing in Zone B. The policy would merely be a request from the City on behalf of neighbors, perhaps with a sign with different messages on each side. People coming to the beach would know the place was clothing-optional, and people going would be asked to wear clothes or a towel in the spirit of “being a good neighbor,” according to Hellier.

What is not legal is indecent exposure, which includes things like flashing or public masturbation. However, the offense’s legal definition is slippery, and Hellier said it is not easy to draw the line. 

To be clear, neither activists nor neighbors wanted to protect any right to sexual activity at the park. At least one trans woman named Aspen said she’d seen people having sex there, and the people doing it weren’t queer but rather creeps jerking off at queer people. Kimseylove said they have applied for a grant to fund an anti-public masturbation campaign through the Seattle Department of Neighborhoods. 

Others were angry about how the project came together. The day before the meeting, KUOW identified wealthy businessman and philanthropist Stuart Sloan as the donor willing to pay for a playground at the historically gay and nude Lake Washington beach. A communications firm hired by Sloan claimed he wouldn’t have been the only donor, and that the idea came from the City.

The Stranger revealed that Mayor Bruce Harrell, who claimed not to know the identity of the donor, met with Sloan twice, including on the day after Parks killed the playground proposal in December. KUOW found that before the plan was in motion, Sloan texted the Mayor’s personal cell phone to complain about the park.

At the meeting, a speaker on Zoom who identified themselves as “Smook” said the proposal was asking park users to make concessions to the freedom they enjoyed under state law, and they questioned what the neighbors would do to ease the discomfort they felt about the homophobic implications of the playground plan. 

Another Zoom speaker named William called the entire meeting a waste of his time, and he wanted Parks to acknowledge the trust lost with the community. William, who said he lives in Capitol Hill, said he has as much right to the beach as waterfront property owners. He opposed the policy and said it should be rejected as an embarrassing thing that happened in Seattle.

“I’m opposed to policing how people are using the park,” he said. “I don’t want surveillance. I don’t want any weird educators in vests floating around and telling me my hand is too close to my dick or anything. This is an entirely made-up problem.”

Neal, who would not share his last name, considered the policy a concession to the interests of wealthy homeowners. He did not want more enforcement at the beach. He felt the policy could be used to enforce things that aren’t law.

Defending a Compromise

In response to critiques from attendees, Friends of Denny Blaine Park co-lead Sophie Amity Debs said that the policy protected the long-term future of the beach. She said some people didn’t feel confident they could go to the beach and not be harassed by cops, and that putting these guidelines in writing would prevent future police crackdowns and the potential for indecent exposure charges. She said whether this draft is final, or whether changes are made, Friends of Denny Blaine Park believes that this supplemental language would prevent anyone from saying they didn’t expect to see nudity there. Co-lead organizer Kimseylove said neighbors were willing to consider the threat of legal consequences for nudity.

“We think that getting a very clear recognition on the books from the parks department, and you know, as city ratification that this is a historically clothing optional beach … makes it a hell of a lot harder to put a playground there in the future.” 

Neal said that he agreed, and it would be good to codify that Denny Blaine is a naked space, but that it should be the only thing in this policy document.

If any neighbors were in attendance, none spoke up. Some have formed Denny Blaine Park for All, a group that identifies itself as an association of “concerned neighbors dedicated to creating a welcoming and safe environment at Denny Blaine Park.” Their website calls for clear policy language, signage with a code of conduct, an enforcement plan developed with Parks and the Seattle Police Department, and “clear accountability measures.” On a donation page, the group says contributions will help fund essential outreach and administrative efforts and community outreach programs.

The Stranger requested an interview with Denny Blaine Park for All and sent a list of questions asking the group to explain its concerns, including what it wanted a sign to say, which enforcement actions it wanted, more details on accountability measures, and what legal fees it anticipated. Denny Blaine Park for All did not reply.

The group’s website claims it is actively negotiating the policy with activists. Kimseylove, co-lead from the activist group Friends of Denny Blaine Park, said they aren’t aware of overlap between the people who’ve come to the table to hash out a solution and the neighbor’s group.

Next Thursday, Parks employees will present the proposed supplementary use guidelines to the Board of Parks and Recreation Commissioners at a public meeting at Martin Luther King FAME Community Center. 

Parks will return to the Board on June 13 with the public comments and any revisions to guidelines. Hellier said Parks was likely going to recommend the Board vote to adopt the policy.

After that, Parks Superintendent AP Diaz decides whether to adopt the guidelines; Hellier told the crowd that it’s technically Diaz’s decision, but generally Parks listens to how the Board votes.

Wait, How’d This All Start Again?

The fight over Denny Blaine began last November, when the Parks Department announced it would build the “children’s play area” at the park. Regulars saw problems right away, like that Denny Blaine was a place gay people have gone to chill naked for at least 40 years or more. At the time, many told The Stranger that it was one of the few authentically gay places left in Seattle where you could go without spending a cent. Trans people told this reporter they felt unsafe stripping down anyplace else.

For many, building a “children’s play area” at Denny Blaine seemed less a mood-killer than an attempt to use vicious stereotypes against the community. 

Across the country, Republican politicians, right-wingers, and anti-trans activists are claiming that LGBTQ people, especially drag queens, are predators attempting to hypnotize their children into gayness. This ancient, derogatory claim has no basis in fact, and yet it has been used successfully to pass everything from bathroom bans, restrictions on drag performances, and bans on transgender health care for kids. Seattle queers feared that if the playground had been built, simply going to Denny Blaine could have been used against them, or that police would charge them with indecent exposure. (Some said they could almost picture the salacious Fox News headline, and so could we).

It’s unclear whether donor Sloan, the City, or the neighbors were even aware that the plan could have been seen as malicious. The Stranger asked Denny Blaine for All if it understood why people perceived the plan as an attack, but it did not respond. Kimseylove told The Stranger that during the first meeting with activists, neighbors said that homophobia was not a motivating factor. They said neighbors later “vehemently” supported designating Denny Blaine as a historic LGBTQ beach, something Kimseylove is  pursuing at the state level. At the meeting Thursday, Hellier said Parks didn’t want to designate Denny Blaine as an official nude beach because they worried it would cause overcrowding.

On December 6, activists flooded the Martin Luther King FAME Community Center with bodies, signs, and slogans. The City contended that the neighborhood needed a playground, as none were within 10 or 15 minutes walking distance.

About 50 of the 380 people in attendance testified to the sanctity of Denny Blaine, including a mother who said she loved playgrounds but asked where else she could sunbathe naked without judgment, and a man who said he conquered body dysmorphia and suicidal thoughts on that beach. A trans woman who survived conversion therapy and fled red state laws felt safe there, too, as did a Black trans man named Vince Reiman, who proclaimed Denny Blaine was his “miracle.” Together, they sent a unified message to the City: Hands off the beach.

That night, parks department administrators told the crowd they’d have an answer for them in two weeks. It was a Wednesday; the plan was dead by that Friday.

The Stranger

The City wants to draw a nudity DMZ at the parking lot.

by Vivian McCall

The battle for Denny Blaine continued at a sometimes contentious public meeting at the Seattle Department of Parks and Recreation headquarters Thursday evening. 

The department, which last year announced a wildly unpopular, millionaire-funded plan to construct a children’s playground on the grassy area overlooking the shore of a historically queer nude beach, has been meeting jointly with neighbors and activists who have organized a Friends of Denny Blaine Park group with The Seattle Parks Foundation. They all met to reach an agreement hoping to end years of conflict over the beach.

Their solution? Supplementary use guidelines for Denny Blaine that make clear nudity, which is already legal in Seattle, is allowed at the park, with a compromise that establishes locations where the City would request park users wear clothing or a towel “out of consideration for the surrounding neighborhood.” 

If adopted, the City would draw a nudity DMZ at the parking lot and divide the park into two zones: A naked Zone A, composed of the grassy area and beach, and a clothed Zone B, consisting of the loop of road, E. Denny Blaine Pl., outside the park where several neighbors live. The City is taking public comment on the policy until June 6.

Those in attendance didn’t like the idea of a clothed Zone B, at all.

“This Is an Entirely Made-up Problem.”

At the end of the meeting, which went 40 minutes over schedule, Friends of Denny Blaine co-lead organizer Colleen Kimseylove asked anyone in favor of Zone B to raise their hands. Only two hands shot up. When Kimseylove asked those against Zone B to do the same, the other 40 or so people in the room raised their hands.

“That was very clear data,” Kimseylove said. Earlier in the meeting, they asked the crowd to ask themselves if this “concession” was worth making peaceful relations with the neighbors possible. 

Justin Hellier, a strategic policy advisor for Seattle Parks and Recreation, began Thursday’s meeting thanking the crowd for being there, despite any community trust lost with Parks over the playground plan.

Hellier said Parks was hoping to find a balance that works “for everyone.” Hellier said earlier that week Parks held a separate listening session with neighbors who felt intimidated at the December meetings. At the negotiation table, both sides agreed a forum for both groups would be unproductive.

Greg Shields questioned why they’d known about this meeting and not the other. Hellier answered that the neighbors and activists were both given meeting times and took different approaches. Friends of Denny Blaine posted the meeting details publicly, and the neighbors kept theirs private.

Others questioned the need for the guidelines when the law already protected their right to be naked at Denny Blaine. 

Nudity has been legal in Seattle since the 1990s; although the City doesn’t believe nudity is allowed anywhere and anyplace in Seattle, Park and police couldn’t enforce clothing in Zone B. The policy would merely be a request from the City on behalf of neighbors, perhaps with a sign with different messages on each side. People coming to the beach would know the place was clothing-optional, and people going would be asked to wear clothes or a towel in the spirit of “being a good neighbor,” according to Hellier.

What is not legal is indecent exposure, which includes things like flashing or public masturbation. However, the offense’s legal definition is slippery, and Hellier said it is not easy to draw the line. 

To be clear, neither activists nor neighbors wanted to protect any right to sexual activity at the park. At least one trans woman named Aspen said she’d seen people having sex there, and the people doing it weren’t queer but rather creeps jerking off at queer people. Kimseylove said they have applied for a grant to fund an anti-public masturbation campaign through the Seattle Department of Neighborhoods. 

Others were angry about how the project came together. The day before the meeting, KUOW identified wealthy businessman and philanthropist Stuart Sloan as the donor willing to pay for a playground at the historically gay and nude Lake Washington beach. A communications firm hired by Sloan claimed he wouldn’t have been the only donor, and that the idea came from the City.

The Stranger revealed that Mayor Bruce Harrell, who claimed not to know the identity of the donor, met with Sloan twice, including on the day after Parks killed the playground proposal in December. KUOW found that before the plan was in motion, Sloan texted the Mayor’s personal cell phone to complain about the park.

At the meeting, a speaker on Zoom who identified themselves as “Smook” said the proposal was asking park users to make concessions to the freedom they enjoyed under state law, and they questioned what the neighbors would do to ease the discomfort they felt about the homophobic implications of the playground plan. 

Another Zoom speaker named William called the entire meeting a waste of his time, and he wanted Parks to acknowledge the trust lost with the community. William, who said he lives in Capitol Hill, said he has as much right to the beach as waterfront property owners. He opposed the policy and said it should be rejected as an embarrassing thing that happened in Seattle.

“I’m opposed to policing how people are using the park,” he said. “I don’t want surveillance. I don’t want any weird educators in vests floating around and telling me my hand is too close to my dick or anything. This is an entirely made-up problem.”

Neal, who would not share his last name, considered the policy a concession to the interests of wealthy homeowners. He did not want more enforcement at the beach. He felt the policy could be used to enforce things that aren’t law.

Defending a Compromise

In response to critiques from attendees, Friends of Denny Blaine Park co-lead Sophie Amity Debs said that the policy protected the long-term future of the beach. She said some people didn’t feel confident they could go to the beach and not be harassed by cops, and that putting these guidelines in writing would prevent future police crackdowns and the potential for indecent exposure charges. She said whether this draft is final, or whether changes are made, Friends of Denny Blaine Park believes that this supplemental language would prevent anyone from saying they didn’t expect to see nudity there. Co-lead organizer Kimseylove said neighbors were willing to consider the threat of legal consequences for nudity.

“We think that getting a very clear recognition on the books from the parks department, and you know, as city ratification that this is a historically clothing optional beach … makes it a hell of a lot harder to put a playground there in the future.” 

Neal said that he agreed, and it would be good to codify that Denny Blaine is a naked space, but that it should be the only thing in this policy document.

If any neighbors were in attendance, none spoke up. Some have formed Denny Blaine Park for All, a group that identifies itself as an association of “concerned neighbors dedicated to creating a welcoming and safe environment at Denny Blaine Park.” Their website calls for clear policy language, signage with a code of conduct, an enforcement plan developed with Parks and the Seattle Police Department, and “clear accountability measures.” On a donation page, the group says contributions will help fund essential outreach and administrative efforts and community outreach programs.

The Stranger requested an interview with Denny Blaine Park for All and sent a list of questions asking the group to explain its concerns, including what it wanted a sign to say, which enforcement actions it wanted, more details on accountability measures, and what legal fees it anticipated. Denny Blaine Park for All did not reply.

The group’s website claims it is actively negotiating the policy with activists. Kimseylove, co-lead from the activist group Friends of Denny Blaine Park, said they aren’t aware of overlap between the people who’ve come to the table to hash out a solution and the neighbor’s group.

Next Thursday, Parks employees will present the proposed supplementary use guidelines to the Board of Parks and Recreation Commissioners at a public meeting at Martin Luther King FAME Community Center. 

Parks will return to the Board on June 13 with the public comments and any revisions to guidelines. Hellier said Parks was likely going to recommend the Board vote to adopt the policy.

After that, Parks Superintendent AP Diaz decides whether to adopt the guidelines; Hellier told the crowd that it’s technically Diaz’s decision, but generally Parks listens to how the Board votes.

Wait, How’d This All Start Again?

The fight over Denny Blaine began last November, when the Parks Department announced it would build the “children’s play area” at the park. Regulars saw problems right away, like that Denny Blaine was a place gay people have gone to chill naked for at least 40 years or more. At the time, many told The Stranger that it was one of the few authentically gay places left in Seattle where you could go without spending a cent. Trans people told this reporter they felt unsafe stripping down anyplace else.

For many, building a “children’s play area” at Denny Blaine seemed less a mood-killer than an attempt to use vicious stereotypes against the community. 

Across the country, Republican politicians, right-wingers, and anti-trans activists are claiming that LGBTQ people, especially drag queens, are predators attempting to hypnotize their children into gayness. This ancient, derogatory claim has no basis in fact, and yet it has been used successfully to pass everything from bathroom bans, restrictions on drag performances, and bans on transgender health care for kids. Seattle queers feared that if the playground had been built, simply going to Denny Blaine could have been used against them, or that police would charge them with indecent exposure. (Some said they could almost picture the salacious Fox News headline, and so could we).

It’s unclear whether donor Sloan, the City, or the neighbors were even aware that the plan could have been seen as malicious. The Stranger asked Denny Blaine for All if it understood why people perceived the plan as an attack, but it did not respond. Kimseylove told The Stranger that during the first meeting with activists, neighbors said that homophobia was not a motivating factor. They said neighbors later “vehemently” supported designating Denny Blaine as a historic LGBTQ beach, something Kimseylove is  pursuing at the state level. At the meeting Thursday, Hellier said Parks didn’t want to designate Denny Blaine as an official nude beach because they worried it would cause overcrowding.

On December 6, activists flooded the Martin Luther King FAME Community Center with bodies, signs, and slogans. The City contended that the neighborhood needed a playground, as none were within 10 or 15 minutes walking distance.

About 50 of the 380 people in attendance testified to the sanctity of Denny Blaine, including a mother who said she loved playgrounds but asked where else she could sunbathe naked without judgment, and a man who said he conquered body dysmorphia and suicidal thoughts on that beach. A trans woman who survived conversion therapy and fled red state laws felt safe there, too, as did a Black trans man named Vince Reiman, who proclaimed Denny Blaine was his “miracle.” Together, they sent a unified message to the City: Hands off the beach.

That night, parks department administrators told the crowd they’d have an answer for them in two weeks. It was a Wednesday; the plan was dead by that Friday.

The Stranger

Protesters Didn’t Win Everything, but Some Gazans Will Go to UW for Free

by Hannah Krieg

The United Front for Palestinian Liberation (UF) will voluntarily pack up their encampment at the quad over the weekend after striking a deal with the University of Washington (UW). Administration agreed to evaluate a proposal to divest from Israel through the Advisory Committee on Socially Responsible Investing, be “transparent” and “examine” the University’s relationship with Boeing and other weapons manufacturers, and waive tuition for at least 20 students from Gaza, among other things. It is unclear if protesters reached a consensus on the deal, but no one seems happy.

In a statement, UF said they are “under no illusions that this agreement is a win. The only true win is Palestinian liberation.” 

“Many of our demands remain unfulfilled as the UW has shown clear reluctance to make even the smallest progress towards reducing our complicity in the ongoing genocide in Palestine,” UF said in a press release “The UW has demonstrated its commitment to neoliberal values, war profiteers, and facilitators of oppression over the calls of its students, faculty, and workers. UW would rather maintain the status quo than stand against genocide.”

Given increased hostility from UW President Ana Mari Cauce toward the protesters in the past week, this agreement may be the best deal the students could broker without escalating their tactics, which UW said would cause them to walk away from the bargaining table. UW did not respond to my request for comment.

The UF pitched tents in the Quad on May 1 to establish an encampment, picking up a Gaza solidarity movement launched by students at Columbia, UCLA, and other colleges. The encampment went by several names, including the Liberated Zone and the Popular University for Gaza. 

Students tacked up their list of demands to a canopy: Materially and academically divest from Israel, cut ties with Boeing, and end the repression of pro-Palestinian voices on campus. At the time, organizers said they would not leave until their demands were fully met, even if that meant camping through summer break. 

While conservative media clearly wanted a show, the protesters didn’t take the bait. Instead of engaging with counter-protesters, students and their allies defended their encampment from MAGA-head spillover after the May 7 Charlie Kirk event, and again on May 12 when a bunch of pro-Israel Christians tried and failed to “buzzsaw” through the quad. Aside from some isolated scuffles, protesters stayed relatively peaceful. 

Nevertheless, UW President Ana Mari Cauce seemed to snap on May 15. After the protesters managed to keep their cool under the pressure of the two confrontations, in a public statement Cauce called the graffiti on University buildings an “antisemitic” “escalation.” She did not specify what she considered antisemitic. 

The word “escalation” should sound an alarm for UF. UW admin made it clear that if the students escalated, then they would end negotiations over their demands. Cauce’s statement implicitly threatened just that. 

It would seem that UF only had two main paths at that point: Escalate to put pressure on the admin, even if it meant losing access to sit-down negotiations, or take what they could get at the bargaining table to avoid the consequences that students at other schools saw. 

For a moment, it looked as if UF wanted to keep the encampment alive. The group started sharing more details about their negotiations with UW, which they had previously kept private so as to not jeopardize a potential deal. They even revealed how uncompromising the UW had been, showing their demands next to admin’s measly offers. 

NEW: After keeping quiet about negotiations, UW United Front For Palestinian Liberations reveals the university admins offers vs. their specific demands 1/? pic.twitter.com/tfZqjNhBeA

— Hannah Krieg (@hannahkrieg) May 16, 2024

It is unclear what changed in the last two days, but in a May 17 press release, UF struck a more positive tone, highlighting the places where UW did concede:

Representation on Divestment Committee: “Advance two representatives recommended by this group to serve on the ACSRI for Board of Regents consideration.”

Scholarships for Gazans: “UW will waive tuition for at least 20 displaced Palestinian students from Gaza, and commits to fundraising to cover additional costs for these students.”

Academic Boycott: “UW will establish a faculty committee to recommend and solicit changes to study abroad programs, that exclude participation from students from specific countries or communities, including Palestinian or other Arab students.”

Center for Scholarship of Palestine: “On the recommendation of this committee and the corresponding Deans, the Provost will commit seed funding to accelerate a hiring plan (e.g. cluster hiring) beginning in fall 2025 to build thematic strength as a foundation to pursue faculty-led future fundraising, grant applications, and/or organized research or study units.”

Palestinian Universities: “The University’s Office of Global Affairs is prepared to help interested faculty pursue new and renewed academic connection with Palestinian Universities. Efforts will initiate in summer 2024.”

Military-Industrial Complex and Ethical Labor Task Force: “The University will be transparent about its investment holdings and fund managers. The University has no direct investments in Boeing, major weapons manufacturers, or companies domiciled in Israel. To the extent there are additional calls to divest from additional companies, we will be transparent about if and how the university is invested in these companies and make available our process for divestment.”

UF maintains they are not satisfied with these concessions. They promise to “contribute to the Palestinian national liberation struggle for years to come until Palestinians can return home, until the olive trees grow and the red poppies bloom.”

The Stranger

The Stranger’s morning new roundup.

by Nathalie Graham

Deadly altercation on I-5: At 4 pm on Thursday police fielded a call about a man ramming his car into a WSDOT vehicle and lift over and over on an I-5 shoulder near Everett. Two WSDOT employees were on the lift. An altercation between the man, who was wielding a hammer, the two employees, and a trooper occurred. The trooper shot and killed the man with the hammer. All lanes northbound I-5 at Union Slough remained blocked well until around midnight Friday. 

#BREAKING: We just witnessed A CRAZY FREEWAY BRAWL between a man who appears to be a construction worker and another man on the side of the I-5 near Marysville. As you see, the construction worker was nearly dragged over the barrier— before he launches a counterattack on the… pic.twitter.com/j2Yg4dz8Xn

— Ryan Simms (@RyanTVnews) May 16, 2024

Guess how much Russell Wilson’s house sold for: I’ll give you some hints before you guess. Okay, it’s in Bellevue. It boasts six bedrooms, a big-ass gym, a movie theater, a yoga room, steps down to the lake or a tram if walking is too tedious, and it’s a whopping 11,000 square feet. It went for $28 million. He’ll probably need the cash now that he sucks at football. 

The call is coming from inside the house: According to the New York Times, Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito flew an inverted American flag outside of his house after the ~contested~ 2020 election. Stop the steal truthers, election result deniers, and Trump loyalists used that inverted flag as a symbol during that period. Alito, a member of the supposedly apolitical Supreme Court, kept the flag up well into Jan 2021, a month you may remember for the literal coup those groups staged on the US Capitol Building. He also flew the flag while the Court was considering whether to hear a 2020 election case. “I had no involvement whatsoever in the flying of the flag,” Alito told the Times in an email. “It was briefly placed by Mrs. Alito in response to a neighbor’s use of objectionable and personally insulting language on yard signs.” Yeah, okay, sure, whatever you say, Samuel. 

The weather: Look out your window. There’s your forecast. Crack it open a bit and you’ll find it’s slightly chillier than you’d like it to be.

Scientists hoping for hurricanes: A few hurricanes might cool off the “crazy haywire” heating going on in the world’s oceans, especially in the Atlantic, scientists believe. If the oceans don’t cool down, then this could be the worst coral bleaching event in history. Currently, 63% of the world’s coral reefs are suffering due to the hot, hot ocean waters. The worst coral bleaching ever got happened in 2017 when 65.7% of the world’s coral were impacted. 

I beg your pardon? Texas Gov. Greg Abbott issued a full pardon for Daniel Perry, an ex-Army sergeant convicted of killing an armed Black Lives Matter demonstrator, who was an Air Force veteran, in 2020. Perry claimed self-defense. The jury, who found him guilty of murder in 2023 did not consider this a self-defense situation. Witnesses say the victim never raised his gun. Back around the conviction, two things happened: 1) A bunch of social media posts from Perry came out showing he was, shockingly, a vicious racist and 2) Tucker Carlson called on Abbott to pardon Perry. So, in response to a recommendation for pardon by the Abbott-appointed Texas Board of Pardons and Paroles, Abbott issued a full pardon, which will also restore Perry’s right to carry firearms. Texas, how do you feel about your governor bending over backwards to make Tucker Carlson—of all people—happy? 

Take your bike for a ride along the lake! It’s a Lake Washington Bike Weekend! Sure, we could have a car-free Lake Washington Boulevard all the time, but that would be a hassle for the cars, so enjoy your scraps, non-drivers.

Bicycle Weekends on Lake Washington Blvd. is happening this weekend! 🚴🏾‍♂️ We invite the community to bike, jog or stroll along the boulevard between the Seward Park entrance and Mount Baker Park’s beach during the event times. https://t.co/bT9E6ZBi0V #SeattleShines pic.twitter.com/XjNvgH7R77

— Seattle Parks (@SeattleParks) May 16, 2024

Class action suit for Pagliacci: Pagliacci Pizza apparently can’t figure out this “being a good employer” thing. This time, the pizza place faces a suit alleging it did not properly reimburse delivery drivers for car expenses, such as not paying drivers on a per-mile basis. The funny thing is Pagliacci settled a different class action lawsuit alleging similar mileage reimbursement issues back in 2021, and it failed to implement any changes until 2024. This current lawsuit “alleges that because workers were denied full reimbursement of costs necessarily incurred in performing their jobs, Pagliacci was in violation of state minimum wage and wage rebate law,” the Seattle Times reports. 

Important golfer arrested before tee time: The golf world was rattled this morning when police arrested golf star Scottie Scheffler outside the PGA Championship while he was on his way to compete. Police were investigating a pedestrian death outside the golf club hosting the PGA Championship. Scheffler, in a marked PGA car, reportedly drove past police. Officers screamed at him. He stopped, then the cops “pulled Scheffler out of the car, pushed him up against the car and immediately placed him in handcuffs.” He was booked “for second-degree assault of a police officer, third-degree criminal mischief, reckless driving and disregarding traffic signals from an officer directing traffic.” Despite being thrown in jail, he still made his tee time. Will this show golf fans that cops are not actually chill and cool guys?

Aid reaches Gaza by sea: For the first time in two months, aid came to Gaza from the sea. The shipments were delivered via a floating pier and causeway constructed by the US military and anchored to the beach. The US was clear that it only dropped off the shipments and that no US trucks went into Gaza. While any aid helps, officials say the sea shipments will not be enough to ameliorate the famine in Gaza. 

Storms rock Houston: A batch of wild thunderstorms swept through Houston Thursday night. Winds up to as high as 100 mph battered the city, felling trees, shattering windows, twisting metal poles, and, in one instance, breaking through a building’s wall. Four people died—two from fallen trees, one from a crane toppling over, the fourth cause unknown—and around a million people are without power. Things are expected to get hot in Houston this weekend and crews are scrambling to get power back on. 

No words Houston@ABC13Houston @Mattlanza @weatherchannel@TxStormChasers @spann @StephanieAbrams @JeffLindner1 @JenReynaTV #houwx #htx #TXWX #hounews #abc13 #storms pic.twitter.com/sNjifOReWi

— Storm Chaser Houston (@StormChaserHTX) May 17, 2024

UW cuts accused rapist: Tylin “Tybo” Rogers, the Husky running back awaiting trial for raping two women, has been cut from the football program. Rogers pleaded guilty to second- and third-degree rape charges. 

That’ll fix it: Gov. Ron DeSantis signed a bill into law that will delete all mention of climate change from Florida’s state laws. This should be a fool proof solution to the rising sea levels, record-breaking temperatures, and extreme hurricane seasons impacting the state. 

Mark your calendars, women soccer fans: Brazil is hosting the 2027 Women’s World Cup. This will be the first time a South American country has hosted the women’s tournament. I’m going to get my ass there if it’s the last thing I do. 

A long read for your Friday: It’s been 10 years since Elliot Rodger murdered six people around the University of California – Santa Barbara. His mother has been working to help prevent massacres like the one her son committed ever since. Read the Mother Jones piece about Chin Rodger here

New music for your Friday: Billie Eilish released her third studio album Friday. I’ve literally only listened to three songs so far, but this shit rips. Here’s the catchiest one of the three I’ve tuned into:

The Stranger

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