Sure, the view is beautiful, but it’s gonna kill us all.

by Stranger Staff

If you love nature, you’ll love Seattle. We have 6,480 acres of parks, 4,563 miles of trails, more than 4 million trees, and stunning mountain ranges in every direction. Even a quick run to the drugstore can come with postcard-worthy views of orcas swimming in the bay. That said, it’s the splendor that surrounds us that will likely do us in. Mount Rainier? Active volcano. Puget Sound? Ideal conditions for a tsunami capable of 42-foot-high waves. All those picturesque rivers, lakes, and streams? Prone to flooding in the city’s 39 inches of annual rainfall. And those orcas? They’re sinking boats, now! (Google it! It’s true!) This beauty will kill us, but the views are worth the dance with death.

Strip Down to Your Skivvies at Denny Blaine Park

Madison Valley

Denny Blaine is my favorite place to be homosexual in the United States. The minuscule, lovably ugly Lake Washington beach tucked into a wealthy cul-de-sac has been a gay hangout for nearly four decades. A predominantly topless lesbian crowd earned it the nickname “Dykekiki,” but today it attracts queers of all kinds and plenty of straight nudists, too. No matter your body type or what genitals you have, DB’s a safe and surprisingly friendly haven for swimming in your skivvies. The magic comes from the deep love people have for it. After the city proposed building a children’s playground at the site this winter, hundreds of angry queers packed a community meeting in protest, ultimately killing the plan. After that outpouring, something tells me this summer will be especially glorious for Denny Blaine. Oh, and no parking signs do mean no parking. Chance it and I promise, you will be towed. (VIVIAN MCCALL)

Owl Prowl at Discovery Park

Magnolia

If you need a break from the depressing black hole that can be city living, I recommend prowling for owls like you’re in a Tove Jansson novel. Located just across from Ballard’s Hiram M. Chittenden Locks in the Magnolia neighborhood, Discovery Park is a gigantic wooded oasis with stunning waterside hikes, a historic lighthouse (more on that below), and several breeds of owls lurking amidst the trees. Owls are nocturnal creatures, but it’s not unusual to see one during the daytime. If you’re feeling particularly adventurous, go on the prowl after dark (the park closes at 11:30 pm); just don’t forget your binoculars. (AUDREY VANN)

Then Search for Sea Stars at West Point Lighthouse Beach

Magnolia

One of my favorite favorite things to do with out-of-towners is tide pooling at Discovery Park’s West Point Lighthouse Beach. Wear shoes you don’t mind getting wet and check for low tide. You’ll know you’re in the right place when you start seeing clams spitting everywhere. It’s like a mini Fourth of July celebration, but instead of fireworks, it’s tiny streams of water being shot up into the sky by buried clams. In the shallow pools, you’ll likely be able to see sea anemones, which are topped with rings of hairy-looking tentacles and look like something dangerous out of Stranger Things, but they’re harmless. You should be harmless, too—if you gently touch the outside of the sea anemones, they will react and close up. NATURE. But what you’re really there to see are the sea stars (the actual term for what common folk call “starfish”). They will be on the big rocks or boulders on the edge of pools and you will have to get low to see them. I have gotten on my hands and knees to spot three purple sea stars tucked under a rock and told a group of people nearby, “Hey! Did y’all see the sea stars here?” To which they replied, “NO! We looked all over that rock for one!” Didn’t get low enough. (RACHEL STEVENS)

Pretend You’re in a Romantic Comedy at Green Lake Park 

Green Lake

*All* the boats on Green Lake. ANTHONY KEO

Looking for a more stable, low-effort form of water recreation? Visit the Green Lake Boathouse on the northwest point of Green Lake Park. There, you can rent tippy vessels like stand-up paddleboards and kayaks (show-off) or, for $28, you can play it safe with an (almost) capsize-proof pedal boat. These large orange-and-blue crafts—which seat two or four people and have been featured in many a rom-com—let you leisurely tour Green Lake without much fear of taking an accidental dip in the lake. (ASHLEY NERBOVIG)

Paddle Around the Heart of Seattle (and Then Get a Burrito!) on Lake Union

University District

Lake Union. ZOSHUA COLAH 

Few activities make me feel more like a Seattleite than picking up a kayak at the Agua Verde Paddle Club and then paddling around Lake Union for a couple hours before returning to the restaurant to stuff myself with a burrito and a fruity bev of some kind. Boat rentals are $29 per hour for a double, so bring a friend and paddle around the perimeter. Wave at the people in the hot tub boats, peer into the houseboats and wonder how much they cost, gaze at the influencers making content in Gas Works Park, sit in awe of the bridge, and marvel at the seaplanes as they take off and land like ducks on the water. (The lake is actually an airport, so that’s kind of fun.) After taking in the views, return to Agua Verde and purchase yourself some premium Mexican fare. The salsas are all amazing, and the burritos will make you happy on the inside of your body. (RICH SMITH)

Take the Path Less Traveled at Carkeek Park

Broadview

This city is rich with an embarrassment of outdoor spaces. Discovery Park and Golden Gardens tend to take all the glory, with their showy beach bonfires and sweeping territorial views, but for my money, Carkeek is the best park in city limits. Just a little bit north of Golden Gardens, Carkeek is a breathtaking 220-acre pinch of the Olympics. The 3.5-mile loop that starts and ends at Piper’s Creek takes you from wetlands, orchards, and mossy little bridges up to big views of the Sound, past the beach (no dogs allowed), and into rolling hilly forests. (KATHLEEN TARRANT)

Freeze Your Ass Off with a Cold Plunge

Various locations

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If you spend any time at Golden Gardens or Alki Beach, you’re gonna see people in the water and wonder, “Isn’t it cold?” Yes! It is! Quite cold. The average sea surface temperature for Elliott Bay, for example, is 59 degrees Fahrenheit in August. But you should jump in anyway! People pay good money for cold plunge baths at high-end spas, and here in Seattle, we get that shit for free. If you’re new to plunging, I highly recommend starting with one of the local organizations that facilitate group events; I really like Coldwater Collective and Puget Sound Plungers. Both post their weekly schedules on Instagram, along with tips for first-timers, and it’s way more fun yelling and swearing and splashing around with other people feeling your pain. (Wear a warm hat! It really does make a big difference!) Your first time will probably suck. I lasted about 20 seconds before bailing and swearing it off for good. But 24 hours later, I wanted to try again. I loved the tingly feeling on my skin and the rush of endorphins. Now I go at least once a week and half the time, I spot some cute sea critter playing out in the water, too. (MEGAN SELING)

Pick Blackberries by Boat at Gas Works Park

Northlake

Don’t buy blackberries in Seattle! Come August and you can pick them pretty much anywhere. Yes, I know they are invasive, but they are also delicious. There are places that get immediately picked over, but I have found a hack! If you travel by boat, there are many places along Lake Union that have the freshest and plumpest blackberries that no one has touched. I bring a bucket (and gloves, because OUCH THORNS) in my canoe and go near Gas Works Park to pick enough to make a pie. And yes, the water quality isn’t the best in Lake Union, and yes, Gas Works used to be an actual gas plant, so the berries might be toxic. But if I’ve learned anything from spending hundreds of hours of my youth watching Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, I can only assume that—worst-case scenario—I will become some kind of crime-fighting blackberry who is mentored by a wise mutant rat. THE PIE IS WORTH IT. (RACHEL STEVENS)

Witness the Miracle of Life at the Ballard Locks

Ballard

Are you in Seattle to gawk at leggy birds? Look no further than the Ballard Locks! It’s a concrete mass separating saltwater from freshwater that functions as a boat elevator and fish ladder between Puget Sound and Salmon Bay. This landmark, the busiest boat locks in the United States, harbors a Janus-faced past and present: an artificial scarring of the landscape that displaced Coast Salish people during its construction—as commemorated on some plaques outside the nearby Pagliacci??—but also a hotspot for wildlife. Demure seals, charismatic salmon runs, yappy sea lions, yacht owners in the throes of a midlife crisis, etc., etc. The Janussery continues at the blue heron rookery in Commodore Park (the Magnolia side), a lovely site where loving (leggy) heron parents raise their chicks. The bird colony, though, is also used by local NIMBYists to delay local affordable housing construction under the guise of “ecological preservation.” J’accuse! But also tell the heron I said hi. (ADAM WILLEMS)

Enjoy a Perfect, Whole-Ass Afternoon in Volunteer Park

Capitol Hill

Isamu Noguchi’s Black Sun sculpture at Volunteer Park. ANTHONY KEO

One of the best afternoons you could possibly have in Seattle happens all in and around one park. If you’re able, begin with a walk up the water tower (aka the Poor Man’s Space Needle) to survey your surroundings, catching the downtown and Elliott Bay to the west and the Cascade range to the east. Then head over to the conservatory, where you’ll find rooms of orchids, carnivorous plants, seasonal flowers, and cactuses that look like frost trolls, bongos, and donkey tails. On the way there, say hello to the ducks in the ponds, and peep the actual Space Needle through Isamu Noguchi’s Black Sun sculpture. (Everybody says that sculpture inspired Soundgarden’s “Black Hole Sun” song, but unfortunately everybody is wrong.) Break for lunch at the nearby Volunteer Park Cafe, and then spend the rest of the day in the Seattle Asian Art Museum. This afternoon works in all weather, but in the summer, you might emerge from the museum in time to catch some Shakespeare in the park at the newly renovated auditorium. Planes fly over the park every 30 seconds, so you might want to wear a hard hat while you picnic until Boeing gets its act together. (RICH SMITH)

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The Stranger

From punk shows at roller rinks to trivia nights hosted by Jeopardy! champs.

by Stranger Staff

Seattle has long been known for its fruitful music scene. But we’re more than grunge. Today’s music scene is exciting and vibrant, and there is an abundance of venues across the city regularly showcasing an incredibly diverse selection of local and national talent, from femme DJ nights and drag brunches to experimental noise shows in art galleries. Catch a punk show at a roller rink! Stumble into a world-class jazz jam on a random Tuesday night! See the future of comedy in a pizza restaurant! You’ll only be bored in Seattle if you’re boring.

Attend a Live On-Air Performance at KEXP

Seattle Center

One of the shiniest gems Seattle has to offer is the radio station 90.3 KEXP. Sure, you can stream KEXP all over the world, but there is something truly special about tuning in to the terrestrial signal. And if you’re not in Seattle, you can’t go see one of KEXP’s in-studio performances. KEXP hosts the most incredible artists about once a week and these four- or five-song sets are FREE AND OPEN TO THE PUBLIC. This feels like a best-kept secret that no one is actually keeping secret and yet not enough people are capitalizing upon. Yes, the room caps out at about 70 people so you would have to get there early for tickets; yes, I get that most of these performances are midday and some people hAvE jObS tHeY hAvE tO wOrK; but no, I don’t find either of those excuses valid. We’re talking FREE concerts with your favorite artists who are usually over in a half hour. These are the best quickies in town. Find the schedule and more details at kexp.org. (RACHEL STEVENS)

Rollerskate Around a Rock Show at Southgate Roller Rink

White Center

Southgate Roller Rink is an underrated Seattle treasure in White Center—a roller rink with Baby Ketten Karaoke for most of the week at the bar, and shows in the middle of the roller rink several times a month, with a focus on the rock, punk, and noise end of the genre spectrum. I haven’t tried doing anything fancier other than staying upright while the bands play, but I think bonus points should go to whoever manages to do the first Wall of Death on wheels. (KATHLEEN TARRANT)

Expect the Unexpected at Vermillion

Capitol Hill

Vermillion, an art gallery and bar on Capitol Hill, isn’t reinventing art galleries or bars, but it does always have cool shit that draws an unpretentious crowd. It feels good to be in a community space that’s integrated with local artists, which is why I like it. For instance, I’ve seen a sculpture made of cigarettes and a show of photography, painting, sketches, and leatherwork from Seattle’s leather community. At Vermillion, there’s always a band, storyteller, or some cool artist doing some cool thing that makes this city seem more vibrant. (VIVIAN MCCALL)

Rock the Ballard Block at Sunset Tavern and Tractor Tavern

Ballard

Dropping in on a quality live music set is easy in central Ballard, with the Sunset and Tractor down the street from each other. The Sunset is a former Chinese restaurant that’s now a fun, divey rock ‘n’ roll bar with live music across all popular genres, a photo booth, and friendly bartenders. The Tractor holds court just two blocks away, with gritty saloon-esque decor, tallboys aplenty, and one of the best selections of live local and national rock, pop, alt-folk, and blues in town. (STRANGER STAFF)

Give Live Jazz or Funk a Chance in Wallingford

Wallingford

If you’re planning on painting the town red and that “town” is Seattle, you’re probably not hitting the Wallingford neighborhood. But I think you should! Not too long ago, I randomly wandered into Sea Monster Lounge on a Wednesday night with a couple friends and we saw some of the most fun jazz. I asked the bartender, “Does this happen often?” and he just smiled and nodded. It feels intimate and creative. Check out Sea Monster’s schedule of events and maybe don’t go there to catch up with friends; you’ll just wanna sit, sip, watch, and listen. (And then go for a nightcap at the Octopus Bar and take a photo in their photo booth, because those beautiful machines are dropping like flies these days.) (RACHEL STEVENS)

Let Loose at Babe Night

Various locations

The dance party at Babe Night. Courtesy of Baby Night

It’s safe to say that no Seattle DJ burns more calories per gig than Waxwitch (aka Isabela Garcia). At any of her dozen-plus events per month, Garcia is in near-perpetual motion behind the decks (and sometimes in front of them), dancing up a tropical storm. The fun she’s clearly having while spinning records such as Tom Tom Club’s “Genius of Love” or Björk’s “Big Time Sensuality” acts as a contagion on crowds around the city, particularly at Babe Night, the event into which she’s currently putting the most time and energy—with big dividends. The Babe Night concept seems so obvious and ripe for success, but nobody’s really capitalized on it like Garcia has. She and a rotating cast of the area’s savviest women selectors (including La Mala Noche, Kween Kaysh, and Gold Chisme) play female-centric tracks geared to get hands in the air and butts in gear. (DAVE SEGAL)

Catch a Drag Show… Any Drag Show

Various locations

If contemplating the Big One is getting you down, I have a quick fix for a pick-me-up: any of Seattle’s countless drag shows! It’s hard not to find a show featuring one of Seattle’s many professional, gender-expansive royalty—they’re overflowing from nearly every restaurant, nightclub, and DIY art space across the city. Capitol Hill alone is home to weekly shows at Queer/Bar, Unicorn, and Neighbours, just to name a few. If you’re down south, don’t miss Betty Wetter’s Tush at Clock-Out Lounge in Beacon Hill or the camp-classic Bacon Strip at Jules Mae’s in Georgetown. Up north? There are multiple phenomenal shows at Dreamland in Fremont. I don’t have time nor room on this page to begin listing off the endless brunch options, but if you’re looking for eggs, booze, and hairy ladies in sequined gowns, let’s just say you’re in the right city. (NICO SWENSON)

Do a Fruit Loop at Union

Capitol Hill

What’s a fruit loop, you ask? No, it’s not a rainbow-colored frozen drink that tastes like breakfast cereal. A fruit loop is a… well, I’ll let my group chat field this one: “A ‘fruit loop’ is when one excuses themself from their present company to travel around the interior of a queer establishment and scan the crowd.” “At Union, most will play this off as a bathroom break, as the bathrooms are located at the midpoint of the loop.” “Union is the perfect place for a fruit loop.” “I’ll go to Union first because that’s where everyone starts the night, and then I’ll do my fruit loop.” “It’s building community!” “It’s an opportunity to make intense eye contact with people you’re going to message on Grindr in an hour.” “It’s also just to say hello to friends: I wouldn’t say it’s always about the prowl.” “This guy does it all the time.” “I am very guilty of this.” “I’m sure everyone does it.” (ADAM WILLEMS)

Celebrate Your Old-School Faves at the Royal Room

Columbia City

The Royal Room. DANIE SHEEHAN

A wood-bedecked space with great acoustics in Columbia City, the Royal Room made its name on jazz bookings (it is partially the brainchild of musician and composer Wayne Horvitz) but has since expanded into folk, world music, and multimedia events. Music booker Tish Gallow also produces fun-as-hell tribute nights where some of Seattle’s best celebrate the work of prominent Black musicians, including A Tribe Called Quest, Prince, Queen, and Whitney Houston. Do NOT miss their Juneteenth party, featuring the music of Tina Turner. (STRANGER STAFF)

Witness Seattle’s Funniest Talent Show at Joketellers Union

Beacon Hill

Want to feel like a really online, in-the-know, Seattleite? Go to Clock-Out Lounge to see Seattle comics Brett Hamil and Emmett Montgomery’s long-running biweekly comedy night, Joketellers Union. The show features local and national talents, as well as “special guests with special talents” including “friendship, pizza, and rhythmic clapping.” Whatever ends up happening, it’s always hilarious. I recommend buying tickets in advance, as the shows tend to sell out pretty regularly. For more weird-plus-comedy fun, also check out Friendship Dungeon, a midnight comedy and variety show that Montgomery hosts with Derek Sheen at Comedy/Bar. (ASHELY NERBOVIG)

Party Among Vintage Porn at Pony

Capitol Hill

Party at Pony. KELLY O

Pony has an outdoor fire pit, fantastic bartenders, clever DJs, and vintage gay porn (i.e., huge dicks) wheat pasted to the walls. Plus, there’s a photo booth. Plus, a glory hole in the bathroom. Once I showed up on a Tuesday for karaoke, and the entire cast of a touring production of The Book of Mormon was there, singing their hearts out. (CHRISTOPHER FRIZELLE)

Dodge—or Don’t—the Overflowing Urinal at the Cuff Complex

Capitol Hill

This summer, Paris will host world-class water sports in the form of long-distance Olympic swimming in the Seine; Seattle is home to a more permanent water-sports fixture in the form of pee flowing pretty consistently onto the dance floor of the Cuff Complex (aka the Cuff), a leather-forward gay dance club on Capitol Hill. Blame the aquatics on faulty plumbing. There’s one cursèd urinal on the mezzanine level of this Dante’s Inferno-esque nightlife destination that I’ve never not seen overflowing with poise and grace down the stairs. If it’s your thing, take your shirt off and bring rain boots that match your harness! Or don’t bring boots if that’s your thing, I guess. (ADAM WILLEMS)

Test Your Wits at Head in the Clouds Trivia

Various locations

Allow me to brag for a second: I was a member of my school’s Knowledge Bowl team and made it through multiple rounds of Jeopardy! callbacks in 2020, although I sadly never got that fateful call from Culver City. (I’m not giving up yet, though!) Are you a fellow freak for seemingly useless knowledge? Can you pick all of the Real Housewives out of a lineup? Do you have an uninterrupted New York Times crossword streak? If so, come to Head in the Clouds to flaunt your impressive command of minutiae. University of Washington grads and Jeopardy! champions Sally Neumann and Leah Caglio host this trivia night at bars throughout Seattle from Sunday through Thursday. You won’t find your typical musty, male-dominated questions here—the duo has made it their mission to incorporate topics that have traditionally gotten less respect, like pop culture, and to approach history from an anti-colonial perspective. (JULIANNE BELL)

Take a Swing at Curveball Karaoke

Columbia City

If you’re looking for a rowdy crowd at 8 pm on a Tuesday night, head to Lottie’s Lounge in Columbia City for Curveball Karaoke. Regulars and newcomers alike cram together to belt out everything from ’80s classics to Lady Gaga. Sometimes a guy even brings a saxophone to play along, and a few writers from The Stranger occasionally make an appearance as well. The night is so beloved, there’s even a portrait photography book featuring regular participants—check it out at curveballkaraoke.com. (ASHLEY NERBOVIG)

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The Stranger

The best side of Seattle is waiting for you at the hot dog cart.

by Stranger Staff

It’s true that Seattleites can come off as shy at best and emotionally unavailable to a clinical degree at worst. The Cascadia subduction zone has taunted us all our lives, reminding us that our time on Earth is finite. Is it any wonder we haven’t bothered with human connection? But there is one surefire way to soften our stiff exteriors: Food. Something happens when we convene in the waiting area of a favorite brunch spot or stand in line to buy a hot dog slathered with cream cheese at 2 am. We talk to one another. We bond over steaming bowls of pho and burritos the size of babies and slices of cakes that are so expertly crafted, they’re worth the 30-plus-minute wait. If you want to find the best version of Seattle, start with really good food. 

Deep-Throat a Seattle Dog at 2 am (or Anytime, Really)

Various locations

One might pause before deep-throating a hot dog slathered in cream cheese and onions at 2 am, but if you haven’t had a Seattle Dog then you’re truly missing out on the best food option for your drunken night out. Concentrated along the curbs of popular nightlife areas like Capitol Hill, these hot dog stands feed the masses in both vegetarian and carnivorous forms. (A couple favorites include Monster Dogs and Dante’s Inferno Dogs.) I can’t guarantee our Northwestern ways won’t upset your stomach, but if we’re all going to die in a giant earthquake, it’s worth checking this delicacy off your bucket list despite any aftershocks. (NICO SWENSON)

Devour a Burrito as Big as a Baby at Gorditos Healthy Mexican

Greenwood

Steve weissman

I am a lifelong vegetarian, which means that my diet consists primarily of burritos. So, believe me when I say that trying a new burrito place is risky. For one, you never know how big your meal is going to be—I won’t name any names, but I’ve been disappointed by a meek six-inch-tortilla burrito before. That’s why I appreciate the genius marketing that is Gorditos’s “baby burrito.” No, it’s not a burrito made for a baby, but rather a burrito that is the size of an actual infant (see for yourself—the restaurant is plastered in photos of newborns beside their foil-wrapped counterparts). Plus, there are so many vegetarian fillings beyond the standard fajita veggies—tofu, fried potatoes, scrambled eggs, avocado, steamed vegetables… the list goes on! There’s also meat—your choice of chicken, steak, and pork—if you’re into that kind of thing. (AUDREY VANN)

Dine at the Bar at Canlis

North Queen Anne

Contrary to conventional belief, you don’t have to drop $400 to enjoy this stunning and historic Seattle institution. Turns out, you can just show up and sit at the bar. Established in 1950, Peter Canlis and his family created a restaurant that’s known across time and space for its hospitality, creativity, quality, and sheer voluptuousness, and they have a whole swimming pool of James Beard awards to show for it. Anyway, the lounge is right next to the entrance, totally separate from dining, and you can just go. Canlis has loosened the dress code since the dotcom boom, when all the millionaires were 22 and couldn’t be pried from their gravy-stained Linux T-shirts, but you should make an effort. Put on some decent shoes and maybe a jacket, tell the host you’d like to be seated in the bar, and order a drink and the emblematic Canlis salad. A nod to the Canlis family’s Mediterranean roots, it comprises romaine, preposterously high-quality bacon, cherry toms, scallions, fresh mint and oregano, shredded Romano, an eggy-lemony Caesarean dressing, and the most incredible mind-bending croutons that’ve been fried in the acorn-fed, shade-grown bacon fat. Eat yer salad, nurse your drink, and listen to the pianist, who was playing “Poker Face” the last time I was there. Damn, look at you. You eat at Canlis. (MEG VAN HUYGEN)

Chomp on Grasshoppers at a Mariners Game

SoDo

There are Mariners fans and then there are Mariners fans who eat grasshoppers. I’m not telling you which one to be, but I’m telling you that when your ballpark is one of two ballparks in the country (the Oakland Coliseum is the other) that sells chili-lime grasshoppers, you take pride in that weirdness. Toasted grasshoppers, or chapulines, are a common and beloved dish in parts of Mexico—especially Oaxaca. Edgar’s Cantina in T-Mobile Park, named after Seattle Mariners Hall of Famer Edgar Martínez, sells chapulines and many games sell out of these delicious little bugs before the first pitch is even thrown. (RACHEL STEVENS)

Taste the Original Teriyaki at Toshi’s Teriyaki Grill

Various locations and Mill Creek

Comprised of sticky-sweet glazed chicken thighs, mounds of steamed white rice, and that little cup of crunchy iceberg salad in a creamy sesame sauce, Seattle-style teriyaki is the city’s unofficial comfort food. In 2010, The New York Times declared the local dish the Emerald City equivalent of a Chicago dog. We can thank Toshi Kasahara, who founded Seattle’s first teriyaki restaurant in 1976, for that—Kasahara popularized a sweeter, more syrupy style of the Japanese specialty. Find the ubiquitous staple at any of the teriyaki shops dotting the region—a few favorites include Mikou Teriyaki in Georgetown, Choice Deli & Grocery in Ballard, Nasai Teriyaki in the University District, and Teriyaki Madness, which has multiple locations—or make a pilgrimage to Toshi’s Teriyaki Grill in Mill Creek to try the original. (JULIANNE BELL) 

Order Literally Anything at Fuji Bakery

Interbay and Chinatown–International District 

The cream cheese croissant at Fuji Bakery. MS

Fuji Bakery is the place where any order is right. Their spread is dazzling: sugar-dusted malasadas overflowing with sweet gobs of matcha or ube cream, crispy chicken katsu or egg salad sandwiches made with fat slices of fresh-baked milk bread, deep golden croissants, custardy canelés, and more. I found Fuji (or Fuji found me) shortly after moving to Seattle three years ago, and in that time, I’ve tried nearly everything without disappointment, but the unassuming milk stick, a plain-looking chewy loaf sliced down the middle and slathered with a pillowy sweet cream filling, has emerged as my favorite. At no fault of Fuji’s, parking at its main bakery in Interbay is unwieldy, but worth braving. If you’re in the Chinatown–International District, check out the walk-up storefront on King Street. (VIVIAN MCCALL)

Sip Seattle History at Monorail Espresso

Various locations downtown

Monorail Espresso has a plucky Old Seattle vibe and likes to remind people that it was slinging coffee in Seattle “since 1980 B.S. [before Starbucks].” Their origin story is slightly debatable—Charred-bucks actually opened a few blocks away from the first Monorail Espresso cart in 1971. Fuck Starbucks, though—many locals avoid the chain, partly due to their anti-worker and union-busting ways. What Monorail Espresso undoubtedly DID coin first is their signature burnt cream latte, and you absolutely must try one if ever you find yourself in the downtown grid before closing time. (They have five locations scattered throughout, but they all close by 5 pm, sometimes sooner). The recipe for this smooth, custardy, not-too-sweet confection is an ancient Seattle mystery, so we can only guess what elixirs are in there. Suffice it to say that Monorail’s Arabica house roast is strong but never bitter, the foam is like cashmere, and the deep, rich flavors of slightly scorched brown sugar, butter, and toffee will envelop your orbitofrontal cortex like a jaunty scarf for the rest of the day. Uh, a cashmere one. (MEG VAN HUYGEN)

Tuck into Tacos Inside an Old Bus at Tacos El Asadero

Columbia City

Sure, you’ve heard of a taco truck, but have you ever eaten tacos inside a revamped vintage bus? That’s exactly what you’ll find at this hidden Columbia City gem, which has been around since 2006. Park yourself on a seat at the cramped but cozy bus’s metal counter and tuck into tacos, burritos, quesadillas, tortas, mulitas, or sopitos, stuffed with succulent lengua, birria, carnitas, asada, or adobada. (Outdoor covered seating is also available for the claustrophobic.) This experience, paired with an afternoon viewing at the Beacon Cinema (just a short 15-minute walk away), is my idea of a perfect solo date. (JULIANNE BELL)

Pretend You’re in France at Le Pichet

Pike Place Market

As I was thinking about my favorite things to do in Seattle, a lot of the activities ended up being some form of “pretend to be French.” Carry around a freshly baked baguette at the farmers market! Buy flowers and smell them cartoonishly while looking at a body of water! Wear ballet flats in very bad weather! The Frenchest possible thing to do, however, is go to Le Pichet, just a whisper away from Pike Place Market (the ideal location for all above behaviors). Le Pichet, a staple since 2000 by a former chef at Campagne, is the closest Pacific Northwest equivalent to sipping rosé at lunch in the Luberon. Everything about the cafe is classic, from the daily charcuterie and fromage specials on the blackboard to the herbaceous salads and unctuous onion soup to the multiple sizes of pichets (pitchers) of wine to the sturdy little coupes you’ll probably spill a little bit anyway, as you people watch on a sunny afternoon. (KATHLEEN TARRANT)

Cozy Up with a Cuppa at the Historic Panama Hotel Tea & Coffee House

Chinatown–International District 

Founded in 1910 (and built by Japanese American architect Sabro Ozasa), the Panama Hotel was once home to many of the city’s original Japanese immigrants, and the woman-owned Chinatown–International District institution still houses the belongings of formerly incarcerated Japanese Americans. (Just ask an employee about the old luggage stored beneath the Plexiglas floor.) Panama Hotel also contains the last remaining Japanese bathhouse, or sento, in the United States—it’s nonoperational but still has its original tiling and pre-war advertisements. These days, the hotel’s sweet little teahouse is lined with historical photos of Nihonmachi (Japantown), and you can still book an old-school room overnight to travel back in time. Don’t pass up a chance to pet the resident kitty, Miu-Miu. (LINDSAY COSTELLO) 

Take a Hit of Cristal at La Dive

Capitol Hill

For stoners who want a drink but can’t get the hang of consuming substances from a traditional glass, never fear—the champagne bong is here. At the cool Capitol Hill wine bar La Dive, you can sip champagne from a flute with a stem that looks sort of melted and works as a gravity-activated straw, of sorts, allowing you to suck up your bubbly faster and smoother, like smoke through ice. Careful, though—the champagne still makes you drunk, not high. (ASHLEY NERBOVIG)

Sit at Bruce Lee’s Table at Tai Tung Chinese Restaurant

Chinatown–International District 

Before he was an internationally renowned martial arts superstar, Bruce Lee was just a college kid in Seattle, and his favorite dish was the beef in oyster sauce from Tai Tung—today the city’s oldest Chinese restaurant, founded in 1935. Reportedly, Lee was such a devoted regular that he didn’t even have to order—he’d just sit down at his favorite corner table and the servers would bring him his food. Pay a visit to the local treasure to dine like the “Little Dragon” himself. Charismatic third-generation owner Harry Chan will greet you with a smile, and you’ll see that Lee’s entree of choice is still a banger, swimming in savory-sweet sauce. (He was also a fan of the garlic shrimp, so order that for extra credit.) Follow up your pilgrimage with a visit to the Be Water, My Friend exhibit at Wing Luke Museum—it’s just a block away—to learn more about Lee’s life. (JULIANNE BELL)

Split a Slice of Cake at Deep Sea Sugar & Salt

Georgetown

Just a few of Deep Sea Sugar & Salt’s cake slices. MS

The line for Deep Sea Sugar & Salt cake shop can stretch down the street on sunny weekends. Go there anyway. Charlie Dunmire’s cake empire lives up to the hype, with a rotating menu of about a dozen different cakes and cupcakes on any given day, and there’s not a single dud in the bunch. You’d be wise to take a friend and split some slices for maximum menu sampling. The lemon layer cake has a tart citrus bite that will tickle your parotids; the s’mores and key lime cakes wear caps of puffy, fluffy meringue with peaks reaching out and just begging to be plucked with a finger. One surprising mainstay is the London Fog. With Earl Grey cake, honey and Earl Grey syrup, bergamot mascarpone cream, and tangy cream cheese frosting, it sounds like it would be flowery and herbal, right? Somehow, thanks to Dumire’s wizardry, the combination of flavors surpasses the expectations of the individual parts, and it tastes like sophisticated Froot Loops. (MEGAN SELING)

Dominate the 12-Egg Omelette at Beth’s Cafe

Green Lake

If you think you’ve got what it takes to go toe to toe with a truly formidable food challenge, say hello to the famous 12-egg omelette at one of Seattle’s most iconic haunts, Beth’s Cafe. This mountain of a meal is served with all-you-can-eat hashbrowns and your choice of toast, and it’s so intense that back in 2009, Man v. Food host Adam Richman couldn’t finish the damn thing. Thankfully, they also serve up a more manageable six-egg version, and their late-night weekend hours (they’re open til 4 am Friday and Saturday) provide a perfect end to a night of hard partying. The city’s breakfast options looked bleak when Beth’s was forced to close for more than a year during the pandemic, but Seattleites rejoiced when the greasy spoon reopened in 2023, bringing their massive meals with them. (KEVIN DIERS) 

Enjoy Eggs That Bleed Without All the Cruelty at Life on Mars 

Capitol Hill

The Benny & the Jets at Life on Mars. COURTESY OF LIFE ON MARS

Don’t forget your cell phone, because this is one of those dishes where the camera eats first. Life on Mars is a plant-based, music-themed bar and restaurant located on the corner of East Pike Street and Harvard Avenue, and their Benny & the Jets dish—available during Saturday and Sunday brunch—is a completely vegan eggs benedict. And they’re not cheating with some half-assed turmeric-covered tofu patty. No, Life on Mars uses Yo Egg, made of chickpea and soybean protein, to very successfully mimic the photogenic bleeding yolk of a poached egg. As a vegetarian, I do have to warn you that it’s not an exact dupe, but it reaches an itch that vegans otherwise cannot scratch. (HANNAH KRIEG) 

Indulge in a Fancy AF Burger at Gainsbourg

Greenwood

The Gainsbourger at Gainsbourg. Meg van Huygen

A great burger is, of course, a core litmus test of a city’s restaurant scene, and Seattle’s got a stacked roster when it comes to burgerball. The MVP among them is in Greenwood, at French-ish bar/bistro Gainsbourg. The Gainsbourger is equal parts lamb and beef, grilled and served simply on thick brioche with caramelized onion confit, a smear of dijon mustard, and house gherkins on the side, and it is succulent. Everybody knows about this luxurious lamburger because you can get it à la carte during happy hour (all day on Mondays!) for $7, less than half price! But it’s somehow even better with Gainsbourg’s skinny, crisp duck fat frites, accompanied by housemade ketchup and aioli, so if it’s happy hour, tack those guys on. You gotta. And it doesn’t need it, but if you wanna go all out, adding a fried egg and a slice of Gruyère cheese to the Gainsbourger punts this thing into the fricking stratosphere. (MEG VAN HUYGEN) 

Then Eat the Burger Your Inner Child Craves at Loretta’s Northwesterner 

South Park

Loretta’s Tavern Burger. COURTESY OF LORETTA

Loretta’s Tavern Burger’s ingenuity lies in how simple it is: beef, melted cheese, pickles, onion, special sauce, bun. The beef is charbroiled to smoky perfection, the cheese cheeses, the alliance between the pickles and onion is holy, and the toasted bun holds it all up. It tastes exactly the way I remember burgers tasting when I was a child—slightly greasy, but refreshing and supremely filling. The burger pairs well with a beer (duh), their fries, and a hockey game played on mute at the back of the bar. (JAS KEIMIG) 

Drink Beer for Blocks in Ballard

Ballard

Are you on your way to Fremont Brewing’s local physical location, because you’ve seen their beers in local grocery stores? Get off the bus, tap your designated driver’s shoulder, or tuck and roll out of your rideshare car. Fremont cofounder Sara Nelson, who sold her controlling stake in April 2024 when she became the city council president, has since been a governance disaster and minimum-wage combatant on our city council, so we don’t condone supporting anything affiliated with her, and you can do better beer-wise, anyway. Seattle’s edge-of-Ballard stumble-block is legit, stretching from Northwest 54th Street and 17th Avenue Northwest to Northwest 49th Street and 8th Avenue Northwest, with roughly a dozen breweries to choose from—and most of these encourage dining at neighboring food trucks during prime hours. Reuben’s Brews and Stoup Brewing are the neighborhood’s gold standards in terms of award-winning concoctions, drinking variety (from sticky-icky IPAs to smooth pilsners), and cozy indoor and outdoor seating, while Urban Family Brewing Company is Seattle’s utmost sour beer source. The rest are also worth the hit to your liver: Lucky Envelope Brewing for hop-forward delights, Obec Brewing for creative takes on European standards like the English Bitter, and Old Stove Brewing Company’s new Ballard location for a substantial beer garden and a solid BBQ food menu. (SAM MACHKOVECH)

Experience Seattle’s Best Salmon Sandwich at Local Tide 

Fremont

The Salmon Sando at Local Tide. Nathan To

There is no question of the Indigenous cultures that have flourished in close friendship with salmon, and the marvel of frothing river tops in seasons of migration. From the Tulalip to the Chinook, the tribes along the Pacific Coast have over millennia echoed in resplendent communion with their natural collaborators. The team at Local Tide approaches their salmon cuts—cured, slow-poached, and dissected into filets by tracing the natural grain of the fish—almost like artisans approaching a virgin piece of uncarved wood. Topped with pickled onions and placed in between toasted slices of brioche, there is simply nothing bad I could say about the Salmon Sando at the elevated Fremont fish counter. (ANN GUO) 

Crunch into a Ruffles Potato Chip Treat at Little Jaye

South Park

Little Jaye’s pastries are also available at Lady Jaye in West Seattle every Sunday morning. MS

One of Seattle’s best bakeries is tucked away in a quiet area of South Park, off the beaten path and easy to overlook. Do not. Chef and baker Charlie Garrison makes some of the best baked goods you’ll ever put in your mouth. There are trays of golden biscuits wearing crowns of raspberry, strawberry, and apricot jam, and tender Shokupan doughnuts overstuffed with chocolate and vanilla cream. Next to rows of big-ass cookies dotted with M&Ms, peanut butter chips, and Heath candy bits sit stacks of marshmallowy crispy treats. And we’re not talking about your basic back-of-the-box recipe to please picky kids. Garrison’s crispy treats are the size of bricks and loaded with a rainbow of cereals and stir-ins—Cocoa Krispies, Fruity Pebbles, Golden Grahams, freeze-dried marshmallows, chocolate chunks, and pretzels. The star of the show is the crispy treat made entirely of crunched-up Ruffles potato chips. The chips are thick enough to hold their own in the marshmallow bath, making for a decadent salty-sweet, crispy-crunchy marvel. (MEGAN SELING) 

Grab a To-Go Hombow at Mee Sum Pastry 

Pike Place Market and University District

A hombow from Mee Sum Pastry is the OG broke-joke Seattle snack. It used to be that they only made the barbecue pork one, but curry beef, chicken ‘n’ mushroom, and veggie versions were eventually added, and they’re all pretty nice. For my money, though, the classic barbecue pork is The One—something about how the liquid fat from the pork and the red, umami-heavy char siu barbecue sauce mixes with the steamy, slightly sweet Chinese roll. The chewy edges of the meat, the delicate crust of the bread, and the pillowy texture. A singular and specific heaven. (MEG VAN HUYGEN)

Savor World-Class Sushi (and Try Geoduck If You Must) at Maneki

Chinatown–International District

Newcomers may not know that, although our city is pretty fucking white, Seattle’s Japanese American community has been in town almost as long as any other group of settlers—the first wave of emigrants ar- rived from Japan in 1880—and is a crucial part of our culinary psyche. Opening in 1904 and named for the maneki-neko, the beckoning cat figurine that apocryphally brings good luck to its owner, Maneki is the oldest sushi restaurant in the nation, and it’s been a paragon of Japanese cuisine in the US for 120 years. The original building mimicked a Japanese castle, it had private tatami rooms, the servers wore kimono, and the restaurant could seat 500. But during WWII, when its owners were forcibly interned in camps, the building was vandalized and ransacked. Lucky for us, the restaurant reopened half a block away in 1946, with new tatami rooms. Currently owned by former server Jean Nakayama, Maneki’s known by locals as the untouristy spot for world-class sushi (sorry, Shiro). If you ARE a tourist, you can famously eat geoduck here, a PNW delicacy that’s honestly just a big expensive clam shaped like a dick. But like everything else on the menu, Maneki styles it expertly, sauteing it with mushrooms, butter, and chili. (MEG VAN HUYGEN) 

Fight over a Flight at Molly Moon’s Homemade Ice Cream 

Various locations

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You’re gonna wanna try everything on the menu at Molly Moon’s Homemade Ice Cream—staples include salted caramel, honey lavender, mocha chip, oatmeal cookie dough, and Yeti, a sweet cream ice cream base dotted with crunchy granola, swirls of vanilla bean caramel, and chocolate chunks. And the shop’s seasonal selections—loaded with everything from fresh fruits to locally sourced candy bits to hunks of fresh-baked cakes and cookies— are even more impressive! So you could go down the line and ask for a sample of every flavor on those tiny spoons—they will do that for you, they are very nice—or you could live out your Ziggy Piggy dreams with the shop’s infamous ice cream flight, a big bowl stuffed with mini scoops of every single flavor on the menu. That’s 15 scoops total! It is not for the weak. It is meant to be shared. Bring a friend or five and have fun fighting over who gets the last little melty bit of their mint brownie flavor. (MEGAN SELING)

People-Watch with a Boozy Slushie at Rachel’s Ginger Beer 

Various locations

I’m a lightweight and I typically don’t drink much, but when you give me the ability to make my own dark and stormy with caramelized pineapple ginger beer from Rachel’s Ginger Beer, it’s game over. There are four Rachel Ginger Beer shops around town, including Capitol Hill, University Village, the Amazon spheres in South Lake Union, and their flagship shop at Pike Place Market, and they all allow you to create your cocktail of choice (with or without alcohol) using any of their home-brewed ginger beer flavors as a base. (The current menu includes blood orange, white peach, pink guava, mango, and blackcurrant.) All locations have good indoor and outdoor seating (and Seattle has an open container law, so you’ll have to enjoy your drink there), but if you go the booze-free route, you can grab your concoction to go and make your way to another prime people-watching (read: tourist-watching) location. If you’re at Pike Place, I recommend the tables outside the north arcade by Old Stove, the Harbor Steps, or, if you’re up for a little more of a stroll, the waterfront towards the Great Wheel. (SHANNON LUBETICH)

Feast on Expertly Fried Fish at Emerald City Fish and Chips

Rainier Valley

I want to say straight off the bat that the best people work at Emerald City Fish & Chips, a small joint whose windows view Rainier Avenue and the ghost of Silver Fork, a restaurant and Black cultural institution that was replaced a decade ago by a Safeway gas station. Emerald City Fish & Chips is still here, and their two-piece Alaskan cod and chips are made with the kind of goodness (back-home goodness) you expect from some of the best people in my town. (CHARLES MUDEDE)

Eat at (at Least) One Restaurant from The Stranger’s Best Restaurants List 

Various locations

Bison barbacoa tacos and cedar tea at ʔálʔal Cafe. MEG VAN HUYGEN

It fills me with ardent and boiling rage when people say Seattle doesn’t have a world-class food scene, as they’re wanking to Michelin-starred food galleries for $200 a plate. We do. It’s just in weird office buildings and old dry cleaner shops, not 10,000-square-foot Redditorial gastropubs in the Amazon Village. Need proof? Just pick one recommendation featured in The Stranger’s 15 Best Restaurants in the Seattle Area 2023 list. It’s true that Seattle’s blue-collar, working-class soul has been tricky to find lately, but in this guide I tell you where it’s hiding. Notable entries include Watson’s Counter in Ballard, Stevie’s Famous Pizza in Beacon Hill and Burien, ʔálʔal Cafe in Pioneer Square (get the bison barbacoa tacos!!!), and Fort St. George in the Chinatown–International District. Don’t knock their spaghetti slathered with garlic mayo until you try it. Find the full list at thestranger.com/bestrestaurants, and look for the 2024 installment in July. (MEG VAN HUYGEN) 

Have you eaten all the best food in Seattle yet? Download a PDF of our checklist to keep track of your progress! 

The Stranger

Only in Seattle can you scream in a museum and dance to Robyn at church.

by Stranger Staff

Amazon. Grunge. Weed. Coffee. Visual art is probably pretty low on the list of things for which Seattle is known. And what a shame. Because Seattle’s art scene isn’t under a spotlight like New York or Los Angeles, artists here aren’t afraid to get a little weird, to take risks. Seattle’s best art spaces and installations are immersive and interactive. They invite you to join in—to touch, explore, gather, and scream your face off. (In more than one instance, actually!)

Stop Sleeping on Seattle’s Best Art Collection at the Seattle Asian Art Museum

Capitol Hill

The Seattle Asian Art Museum is one of the city’s most underrated assets. Previously closed for a three-year restoration, they set their reopening date just in time for the world to collapse into a pandemic. Since society is (sort of) back up and running, it’s time to visit this must-see collection. The gallery features a wide range of historic to contemporary art that is expertly curated, intermingling art from across different regions and time periods to compare and contrast overarching themes. There are countless brilliant and moving pieces in their permanent and rotating collections. See it now, lest it close again for upcoming seismic reasons. (NICO SWENSON)

Scream Your Fucking Face Off at the Seattle Art Museum

Downtown

When strolling through the Seattle Art Museum, you’ll likely hear bloodcurdling screams echoing throughout the galleries. As you make your way past the startled docents through the museum’s new “recontextualized” American art collection, you’ll find those screams emanating from a little room featuring big neon letters that read: “I’VE COMPOSED A NEW AMERICAN NATIONAL ANTHEM / TAKE A KNEE AND SCREAM UNTIL YOU CAN’T BREATHE.” On the floor, a grid of “Daisy Doormats” provides an ironic pad for your knees. The score and padding come courtesy of Nicholas Galanin’s Neon American Anthem (white). In the piece, Galanin, a multidisciplinary artist with Tlingit and Unangax̂ ancestry who works out of Alaska, ironically pairs the last words of so many Black victims of police brutality with the sunny products of capitalism and patriotism, offering viewers a chance to scream in defiance of those systems and, for some, prove loud and clear that they’re still here despite the odds this country stacks against them. (RICH SMITH)

Don’t Kick the Pigeons at Pioneer Square’s First Thursday Art Walk

Pioneer Square

Once a month, Seattleites flock to the streets in Pioneer Square for a chance to stroll, sip on booze, and attend as many art openings as possible at First Thursday. It’s the city’s central and oldest art walk and takes place in a historic neighborhood known for its abundance of galleries. Free wine, cheese, and hobnobbing steal the scene for some, but at its core, it’s an impressive communal unveiling of new artwork. A few favorites include Greg Kucera Gallery, J. Rinehart Gallery, Stonington Gallery, SOIL, and Railspur, a “micro-district” specializing in contemporary pop art. A warning to first-timers: Pioneer Square’s pigeons DO NOT GIVE A FUCK. Those dummies prioritize whatever garbage they’re pecking at over their safety, and they have, through generations of pigeon evolution, adapted to humans walking around them. Watch where you step. (STRANGER STAFF)

Investigate Neukom Vivarium with a Magnifying Glass at Olympic Sculpture Park

Belltown

Mark Dion’s Neukom Vivarium. Courtesy of Olympic Sculpture Park

At the corner of Broad Street and Elliott Avenue in Belltown, a low-lit glass greenhouse shelters a living installation. Mark Dion’s biosystem Neukom Vivarium is built on the foundation of a Western hemlock “nurse log,” a fallen tree from the Green River watershed that now serves as a growing site for young native plants. Sword ferns, deciduous huckleberry, and even spruce trees have sprouted from the log, creating an intricate ecosphere. The entire project emphasizes just how complicated it is to support natural life, and it’s not necessarily meant to evoke warm fuzzies. It’s more of a memento mori work. (Dion told Art21, “This piece is in some way perverse. It shows that, despite all of our technology Neukom Vivarium and money, when we destroy a natural system, it’s virtually impossible to get it back.”) (LINDSAY COSTELLO)

Soak in Seattle’s History at the Duwamish Longhouse and Cultural Center

North Delridge

The history of the Duwamish people is the history of Seattle, and it’s an essential one. Duwamish Tribal Services, which has fought for the Duwamish people to be recognized as a tribe at both federal and state levels for decades, runs the Duwamish Longhouse and Cultural Center at the mouth of the Duwamish River in South Seattle. The space was a collaboration between the Duwamish and architect Byron Barnes of Montana’s Blackfeet tribe in the style of a traditional Puget Salish longhouse. A gathering space, cultural center, and gallery, the Longhouse serves as a hub for the indigenous community that does incredible work for its members and for the Duwamish River Valley, where Duwamish Tribal Services lead environmental restoration, education initiatives, and so much more. (KATHLEEN TARRANT)

Spend a Whole Day Exploring the Central Library

Downtown

Central Library’s Red Floor. CODY MARTIN

There’s a free museum downtown boasting works by George Tsutakawa, Ann Hamilton, Tony Oursler, Lynne Yamamoto, and Frank Okada, and you can explore it floor by floor with a self-guided tour map. Thing is, the museum is actually Central Library, which is better, in my opinion, because you can leave with free books. Culture!!! If I were you, I’d make a day of it—start on level 1 to scope Tsutakawa and Hamilton’s works, then move up to level 4 for a truly eerie experience on the Red Floor, which is bloodied with 13 shades of red paint on the walls, ceiling, floors, and stairs. Jump up to level 10, the highest public viewpoint in the library, to spot Yamamoto and Okada pieces among collections of local Seattle history. (LINDSAY COSTELLO)

Ask “Is the Room Spinning or Is She?” at the Pink Door

Pike Place Market

The Pink Door is a classy Italian restaurant tucked into Pike Place Market. There is no signage, just a (you guessed it) pink door in an alley. I’m convinced that a table at the Pink Door is the hardest reservation to get in this town—especially on Saturdays and Tuesdays. Saturdays make sense, but Tuesdays?? It’s because there are aerialists who perform basically right above the tables on Saturdays and Tuesdays. It’s incredible. You can sip a negroni, eat clam pasta, and watch a sexy performance happening IN THE AIR. All of it feels like you’re in a time when circus performers were celebrities and the best party in town was at a table directly below a woman spinning in a large ring. (RACHEL STEVENS)

Play With Pop Culture at MoPOP

Seattle Center

Star Trek Central at MoPOP. COURTESY OF MOPOP

Museum of Pop Culture (MoPOP, formerly known as the Experience Music Project) is filled with interesting nerd matters about rock ‘n’ roll music (the only major art form that routinely denies being an art form), science fiction, games, and such like. In any other city, MoPOP would be a cherished weirdo sanctuary. In Seattle, it’s a problem because it was started by Paul Allen, who was a local billionaire. Don’t be deterred. If you like that sort of thing, you’ll like it a lot. (SEAN NELSON)

See a Show—Literally Any Show—at On the Boards

Uptown

The city’s home for all things contemporary performance is basically never a bad idea—forward thinkers like Nia-Amina Minor, Anna Luisa Petrisko, Jaha Koo, Will Rawls, and Takahiro Yamamoto have woven liminal narratives there in recent years, and the performance roster is always stacked. With modest beginnings renting space at Washington Hall from then-owners the Sons of Haiti, OtB has expanded into the Behnke Center for Contemporary Performance, its current Uptown location, with consistently sold-out spectacles of improvisational dance, experimental drag, and more. Head there to stretch your perceptions. (LINDSAY COSTELLO) 

Sweat It Out at Dance Church

Various locations

Dance Church immediately inspires curiosity with its culty name, which was coined when Seattle dancers Kate Wallich and Lavinia Vago started a small Sunday morning dance party in 2010. Today, that humble gathering has blossomed into a full-fledged movement with a presence in six cities and an online streaming platform. A professional dancer leads the group in loose choreography to an upbeat pop soundtrack, and participants are encouraged to move their bodies joyfully. There’s just something ineffably cathartic about being crammed in a room with 200 sweaty strangers, grooving your heart out to “Call Your Girlfriend”—devotees report being moved to tears, especially at the end when the collective clasps hands together in a circle. Frankly, I can’t imagine a better endorphin-fueled start to a weekend morning. (JULIANNE BELL)

Prioritize the Chocolate Popcorn at SIFF Cinema Downtown

Downtown

Chocolate popcorn! Ashley Kim

Seattle’s Cinerama theater—one of the only Cinerama theaters left in the country—finally reopened its doors in December after abruptly closing in February 2020. Late billionaire Paul Allen famously saved the theater from demolition in the late ’90s and spent millions of bucks restoring it to its mid-century glory. Local film org SIFF bought the theater from Allen’s estate in 2023, and while rights to the Cinerama name were not a part of the sale—hence the new basic bitch moniker—SIFF was at least able to bring back the famous chocolate popcorn, for which Cinerama was loved. It makes the whole theater smell like hot Cocoa Puffs! Get a 50/50 mix of chocolate and buttered popcorn and swear off seeing movies in any other chocolate-popcornless theater again. (MEGAN SELING)

Worship, You Heathens, at St. Mark’s Cathedral

Capitol Hill

Seattle is thankfully the least religious “large metro area in the US,” and I count myself among its godless horde. But I do know beauty and pleasure when I see it and hear it, and watching robed choristers singing ancient songs of devotion into the echoing chambers of St. Mark’s Cathedral counts as one of the more beautiful and pleasurable experiences this city—and this life—has to offer. The Compline Choir, as they’re called, sings for half an hour every Sunday at 9:30 pm, unless that Sunday falls on Christmas. Despite its holy environs, it’s a real casual community affair. People lay out blankets on the altar, stare up at the huge timber pillars holding up the gorgeous and accidentally postmodern building, and listen to the voices of heaven quiet the week. (RICH SMITH)

Educate the Masses All Over the City

Various locations

On a hot girl walk around a neighborhood of single-family homes you’ll never be able to afford, you will likely stumble across a Little Free Library. Personally, I have never borrowed from such a library, not because I don’t want to, but because it’s always some Nora Roberts shit. Start putting communist propaganda in those things! I want to see handmade zines and pamphlets and annotated copies of The Communist Manifesto. (HANNAH KRIEG)

Then Educate Yourself at Town Hall

First Hill

I’ve lost count of how many events I’ve seen at Town Hall over the years, but one thing I do know: Every time I leave, I leave smarter than when I arrived. Just this year, I heard the brilliant Hanif Abdurraqib discuss his approach to pop culture criticism (be curious, not cynical!) and listened in while Sloane Crosley talked about life and death and her latest book, Grief Is for People, with Ben Gibbard of Death Cab for Cutie. Town Hall’s summer calendar is stacked with intellectual superstars, too, including Miranda July, the Bushwick Book Club performing music inspired by Moby Dick, and Kathleen Hanna in conversation with celebrated local author (and former Stranger writer!) Lindy West. (MEGAN SELING)

Shut Up at Read at a Silent Reading Party

First Hill

Shut up and read. COURTESY OF the SILENT READING PARTY

Invented by a former editor at The Stranger, the reading party takes place every first and third Wednesday of the month at 7:30 pm. The Fireside Room at the Sorrento Hotel goes quiet and fills with people. Everyone brings whatever they feel like reading and sits there and reads, silently, to themselves, while waiters bring them things and Paul Matthew Moore plays piano softly and exquisitely. He’s amazing. You can reserve a seat at silentreadingparty.com. (RICH SMITH)

Find Your Inner Pinball Wizard at the Seattle Pinball Museum

Chinatown–International District

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Twenty-three bucks gets you unlimited play at the best all-ages gaming space in all of Seattle, and its 50-plus pins spread the wealth between historical relics, flashy ‘80s tables, and the modern-day pinball resurgence. I recommend the rock ‘n’ roll table playlist: Guns N’ Roses, KISS, Wizard! (featuring The Who), and not one but two Elton John tables. Tip: The SPM is kind of cramped, so don’t be afraid to take a break after 30–45 minutes, enjoy nearby International District delights (boba tea, dim sum, those amazing Korean hot dogs on a stick), and come back (re-entry is free) refreshed and ready for more Elton-themed pinball. If you’re over 21, you have additional options with drinks and games at Seattle’s four best arcade bars: Coindexter’s (Greenwood), Jupiter Bar (Belltown), Add-a-Ball (Fremont), and Time Warp (Capitol Hill). Each has unique, cool shit to play; if you need our prodding, we’re big fans of the weird Bishi Bashi cabs at Coindexter’s. (SAM MACHKOVECH)

Bliss Out (Or Have an Existential Crisis) in the James Turrell Skyspace at the Henry Art Gallery

University District

Light Reign by James Turrell. Photo by Lara Swimmer

Light Reign was unveiled to the public more than 20 years ago, so if you haven’t spent a few moments meditating in the Henry’s permanent illuminated work, you’re long overdue. Everyone from Quakers to artists and performers have made use of the space, which the light-loving artist James Turrell designed with minimalist bench seating and an aperture-like oculus in the ceiling, revealing a hint of sky. When there’s rain or snow in the forecast, a dome rolls into place over the oculus and emits a celestial glow. The Skyspace’s frosted glass perimeter is also programmed with LED lights that shift in color throughout the day. For heightened effect, Light Reign is a piece to form a relationship with—I recommend visiting once a season to see how your experience shifts. (LINDSAY COSTELLO)

Catch an Indie Flick at One of Seattle’s Many Art House Theaters

Various locations

Seattle is truly a bounty of riches if you’re wanting to go see a film that you likely wouldn’t be able to find anywhere else. The Northwest Film Forum (NWFF) has a whole bunch of thoughtful programming, films both old and new, and some lovely little theaters in which to experience these exciting cinematic visions. The historic Grand Illusion is still kicking ass on a single screen while navigating tough times—they show everything from inventive new works to classic genre fare and beyond. Then there is the Beacon, which also operates with a single screen and boundless imagination, often showing films that fit week- or month-long themes. You truly can’t go wrong with any of these distinct gems. (CHASE HUTCHINSON)

How many things on our list have you done? Download a free PDF of our checklist to keep track!

The Stranger

Welcome to our weird little corner of the country.

by Stranger Staff

Here’s something you might not expect to read in an alt-newspaper run by cynical assholes: many of Seattle’s well-known attractions are worth visiting. Pike Place Market, the Seattle Center, Smith Tower, the Seattle Underground… sure, they’re often crawling with tourists, but they’re also packed with history, offering context to this strange little world we’ve created in the upper left corner of America. And here’s a fun fact, while we’re talking about Seattle constantly being threatened with devastating natural disasters, aka the Big One: The Space Needle was built to withstand up to a 9.0 magnitude earthquake. Good luck up there!

Have a Picnic at the Hats ’n’ Boots at Oxbow Park

Georgetown

Eating a sandwich under, or near, the largest hat and boots in America is a simple joy. Back in the ’50s, Hat ‘n’ Boots served as the respective office and restrooms of the state’s most successful gas station. Business boomed until I-5 siphoned traffic from the Georgetown neighborhood and it closed in 1988. The giant accessories would’ve been erased from the face of the earth if passionate neighborhood residents hadn’t wrangled the funds to save, restore, and relocate the iconic structures to Oxbow Park in 2003. It’s a really big hat! Giddy up! (VIVAN MCCALL)

Stand on the Space Needle’s Glass Floor

Seattle Center

“It’s a tourist trap!” they cry. “What a waste of money!” they shout. Ignore the haters. Whether you’re in town for the weekend or a lifelong Seattleite, it’s worth taking a trip to the top of the Space Needle at least once in your life. The 605-foot-tall attraction was built for the 1962 World’s Fair, but it underwent a massive renovation in 2017 and now features a disorientingly awesome (awesomely disorienting?) rotating all-glass floor. You can stand on it or sit on it or lay on it belly down to feel like you’re (very slowly) flying above the city. One floor above that is an all-glass observation deck that offers one of the best views in the city. (MEGAN SELING)

Get High and Go to the Seattle Aquarium

Waterfront

Greg Stump

One day last year when I was feeling particularly depressed and burnt out, I decided to realize my dream of living out the Reductress headline “Stoned Woman Eating Pretzel Bread at Aquarium Has No Need for God or Money.” Just as I’d suspected, a little herbal enhancement transformed my grown-up field trip into a transcendent experience—I got to learn about the resident harbor seals, witness frolicking sea otters, coo over puffins, and prod anemones in a touch tank. The highlight was gazing at undulating jellyfish in an illuminated tank, which I truly could have done for hours in my altered state. I highly recommend this entire outing as a salve for the melancholy soul. Plus, it’s a little-known fact that you can book free tickets to the Seattle Aquarium through the Seattle Public Library, so with some planning, this low-lift excursion was also completely free. (JULIANNE BELL)

See Where That Person Got Abducted in Malignant

Pioneer Square

There is nothing quite like taking a pilgrimage to pay respect to an iconic horror destination right here within the city. No, not The Ring remake. I’m talking about where the one tour guide was abducted in Malignant. You know, the Seattle-set film that was absolutely not filmed here though is still one of the most bonkers to ever pretend to? If you’re unfamiliar, the film features a key scene where a character is taken while cleaning up from an underground tour. The real tour in Seattle, Bill Speidel’s Underground Tour, is nothing like how it appeared onscreen; it’s actually much more useful for understanding the true and complicated history of this place. But hey, you can always imagine there’s a terrifying figure lurking in the darkness that’s just waiting for its moment to strike. Just make sure you don’t lose your head. (CHASE HUTCHINSON)

Duck Under Flying Fish at the Pike Place Market

Pike Place Maret 

OLGA ANDREYANOVA

Pike Place Market may be one of the most stereotypical Seattle things you could do, but that place is legit magic. The market is full of tourists, but it’s absolutely a place locals go as well. (Never call it “Pike’s Place” unless you wanna get run out of town, and know that most Seattleites just call it “the market.”) There are 500 VENDORS, so every stop can be a new experience, but on your first trip, prioritize two things: fresh flowers and fresh fish. The flowers, sourced from local farms, are unbelievably beautiful and the huge bouquets are a bargain compared to florist shops or even grocery stores. Just beyond the rows of flowers, you’ll find the famous flying fish. A gimmick? Sure. But it’s pretty damn cool to watch the fishmongers throw fish orders back and forth to each other to be bagged up and rung up for customers. And if you’re lucky, you might see celebrities including Bruce Springsteen, Chelsea Handler, or any number of local professional athletes fielding a fish for fans. (RACHEL STEVENS)

Ride a Ferry

Waterfront

ABNER CAMPOS

Every local has their preferred view of Seattle’s skyline. Some swear by Kerry Park on Queen Anne; others insist on Alki Beach in West Seattle. Personally, my favorite view of the city is the one you see while standing on the deck of a Washington State Ferry as it pulls away from Colman Dock downtown. Walk, bike, or drive onto a boat headed to Bremerton or Bainbridge Island—both have charming little city centers within walking distance from their respective landings—and grab a spot on the outside deck on the backside. It will be windy, it will probably be cold, but the air is crisp and salty and the view is incredible. You will see the whole skyline, from the Space Needle to Mount Rainier, stretching out across the horizon. Breathe it in. Then, as the city fades into the distance, warm up inside with a too-hot cup of hot chocolate from a vending machine that looks like it’s been there since the ’80s. (MEGAN SELING)

Use Your Saliva to Save the City (or at Least the Gum Wall)

Pike Place Market

While we might not know who put the first piece of colorful, chewed-up goop along Post Alley’s now-saliva-encrusted bricks, we do know that adding your gum to Seattle’s iconic Gum Wall could be the key to saving the city. Tucked alongside Pike Place Market, you’ll find a tunnel-like passageway covered in chewed-up gum dating back to the 1990s. (The City did try to clean the wall once, in 2015, and removed more than 2,350 pounds of gum, but surely they missed some of the early bits, right?) Grab a pack of your favorite flavor and head on down to become a part of Seattle’s most disturbing wallpaper. Perhaps when the Big One hits, there might be enough of the sticky substance to stop the city from splitting in two… just make sure to wash your hands after. (NICO SWENSON)

Feed the Penguins at Woodland Park Zoo

Phinney Ridge

If you want immediate gratification after walking into the west entrance of the Woodland Park Zoo, head straight to the penguin exhibit to give the little buddies some snacks. Every day from 11 am to 2 pm, people can purchase four fish for $5 and feed the penguins. The exhibit’s basically the first thing you hit and can start your trip off right. The habitat for the Humboldt penguin colony allows you to watch as these birds zip around underwater. Feed the penguins yourself, for the additional fee, or go to just watch the feedings at 2:30 pm every Thursday and Saturday. (ASHLEY NERBOVIG)

Get Soaked—or Don’t!—at the International Fountain

Seattle Center

You haven’t truly been to Seattle until you’ve been baptized in the waters of the International Fountain at the Seattle Center on a barely hot enough summer’s day. Built in 1961 for the World’s Fair, the fountain—which cycles through water shows set to music between 10 am and 9 pm—is a prime place to soak up the sun, dare your friends to touch the metal dome without getting drenched by unpredictable water cannons, or watch kids of all ages experience the purest forms of surprise and delight. It’s free, it’s fun, it’s in the shadow of the Space Needle, and it’s a lifelong challenge—I have never once touched the dome without getting absolutely soaked, though to my intense chagrin, I have watched a cocky teenager walk backward to the fountain’s heart with nary a drop. I’ll get you one day, fountain… (SHANNON LUBETICH)

Hang Out with Vlad

Fremont

The TV news and right-wing pundits love to paint Seattle as some communist hellhole. To be fair, Seattle is a hellhole for many working people, but blame the corporatists in charge. But they do have one monument to help prove their point. A 16-foot bronze statue of Russian communist revolutionary Vladimir Lenin stands on the corner of Evanston Avenue North and North 34th Street in Fremont. Discourse reemerges every so often about ripping the statue down, but the statue, ironically, is protected because it’s privately owned and sits on private land. Go give it a look and get some Dumpling Tzar while you’re in the neighborhood. (HANNAH KRIEG)

Watch the Musical Film About Seattle’s Great Fire at the Museum of History & Industry

South Lake Union

The MOHAI is a must-see for both locals and visitors. The museum houses many stories, artifacts, and activities that help attendees connect with the region and its history, from the Great Fire to the birth of grunge music and technology that changed the world. Permanent exhibits include Maritime Seattle, the Bezos Center for Innovation, and True Northwest: The Seattle Journey. (On that journey, it is very important to watch the musical film about the fire, if only so you can hear the words “GLUE POT, GLUE POT” ringing in your head for days.) (STRANGER STAFF)

Go Troll Hunting

Various locations

Under the famous, almost 3,000-foot-long Aurora Bridge sits Seattle’s most famous troll. (Several other not-so-famous ones live in The Stranger’s online comments section—har har.) A few fun facts: The Fremont Troll was installed in 1990, it weighs 13,000 pounds, and it was a filming location for the 1999 teen rom-com 10 Things I Hate About You. For years the Volkswagon-eating beast ruled the region, but in recent years, Seattle has seen somewhat of a troll resurgence. Buoy, the Seattle Kraken’s grunge-loving blue-haired mascot, moved into the Climate Pledge Arena in 2022, and more recently five of artist Thomas Dambo’s giant wooden trolls—they’re anywhere from 15 to 30 feet tall—have taken up residence in Ballard, West Seattle, Issaquah, Bainbridge Island, and Vashon Island. Try to spot them all! (MEGAN SELING)

Dance—and Drink, and Eat, and Party—in a Neoclassical Skyscraper

Pioneer Square

BRUCE W

After a revamping in 2021, Pioneer Square’s iconic Smith Tower now has all kinds of cool shit going on, including its actually very good lounge, the Smith Tower Observatory Bar. They do movie nights in the Orcas Room, historic talking tours, DJ nights in the summer on the 22nd-floor lookout, and there’s a scary sky cage ringing around the entirety of the 35th floor, and you can get drunk and walk around in it! They also offer cocktail classes that are, at $125 a pop, admittedly not cheap, but you each get three cocktails and a complimentary glass of bubbly and you get to stuff your face interminably on a fancy charcuterie station with kiwi and capicola and about nine kinds of cheese. It’s a whole city’s worth of fun events packed into a single Neoclassical skyscraper. (MEG VAN HUYGEN)

Find Macklemore. It Will Happen. Give It Time. 

Various locations

Every Seattle local has had an encounter with 2010s pop-rap icon Macklemore. I don’t think you can truly claim local status until it happens to you. The Stranger does not condone stalking, so please do not hide in his bushes. Part of the beauty of a Macklemore encounter is that it happens organically, after spending enough time out and about. All I can really say is that vigilance is key—he looks like a great many white guys, so if you don’t have Mack on your mind, you may just pass him by. (HANNAH KRIEG)

Go Back in History at the Klondike Gold Rush National Historic Museum

Pioneer Square

The Gold Rush Museum is tucked away on a corner in Pioneer Square, and if you aren’t looking for it, you’ll probably walk right past it. That is a major mistake. Everyone in Seattle should visit the Gold Rush Museum, which also happens to be one of the country’s tiniest national parks. Many bigger-budget, higher-profile museums do a terrible job of presenting their artifacts, but that’s precisely where the Gold Rush Museum shines. When you enter the museum, your first task will be to choose your character, RPG/Oregon Trail–style. You’ll then stock up on provisions and choose your route. There’s a lot to do in this small space, and the journey pairs particularly well with a pot lozenge. (SYDNEY BROWNSTONE)

Visit a Cool Building Featured on the Buildings of Seattle Instagram Account

Various locations

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Buildings of Seattle is one of the best things to happen on Instagram. Founder Keith Cote created the account at the beginning of the pandemic, and he posts detailed but compressed descriptions of the homes, apartment buildings, and towers of our city. I did not know there was so much to say about Seattle’s architecture until I read the steady and never-disappointing stream of information on this feed of photos and words written in a style that is as informative as it is charming. It’s also noteworthy that Cote is not part of a movement, nor does he take sides with one architectural style over another. He only writes about what catches his eye during one of his many long walks around the city. Scroll through his Instagram feed, find a building that catches your eye, and read up on its history while paying it a visit. (CHARLES MUDEDE)

Having fun? Download a free PDF of the checklist here! 

The Stranger

Adventures that require a bit more time, money, and/or a willing Grindr date.

by Stranger Staff

Oh, hi! You’re done already? You’ve completed all 95 tasks that precede this section and now you’re looking for even more to do? Look at you, you little overachiever! The fun doesn’t have to end. These tasks require a bit more effort, but they’re so worth it if you have the time and money.

Dance to “Feelin’ Like” in a Hot Tub Boat on Lake Union 

Lake Union

The coolest thing I’ve ever done in Seattle is hot tub boat around Lake Union. Now, there are two different companies who offer SITTING IN A HOT TUB AND MOTOR- BOATING AROUND LAKE UNION, which is amazing to me. Two different companies are competing for this market and I’ve gotta tell you: one is blowing the other out of the water. One company allows you to bring booze; the other doesn’t. One company’s tubs are heated by an ACTUAL FIRE in a wood-burning stove on the boat; the other’s tubs are electric? Unclear, but I hear they get cold fast. You should book with Lake Union Hot Tub Boats. (I am not getting paid by Lake Union Hot Tub Boats to say that, but do you see me out here, LUHTB? Girl’s got a birthday coming up!) The thing about hot tub boats is that they are expensive and have become more so in the past four years. It’s $400 for two hours with six people. Not cheap! But let me tell you, watching your friend do a backflip into Lake Union? Pretty badass. Dancing to Bad Colours and Jarv Dee’s “Feelin’ Like” blasting from the provided Bluetooth speaker in a hot tub in the middle of Lake Union? Pretty awesome. Realizing that you’re outta booze, so you gotta putter your hot tub vessel to the boats-only lake convenience store and as the attendant on the dock if you can make a quick beer run even though you’re technically driving a hot tub and not a boat? Well, that’s pretty embarrassing, but it makes for a great story. (RACHEL STEVENS)

Walk the Whole Olmsted 50K

Various locations

The Olmsteds are well known for designing big splashy East Coast shit like New York’s Central Park and Boston’s string of parks known as the Emerald Necklace, but the brothers also spent more than three decades designing 37 of our (objectively more) gorgeous Seattle parks. Last November, to celebrate 120 years of the Olmsted Parks contract, the Mountaineers’ Seattle Urban Walk Committee and Friends of Seattle’s Olmsted Parks mapped out a 50-kilometer (31-mile) walking route that hits over two dozen of those parks. The route is broken up into five 5-7 mile sections, beginning at the Ballard Locks and ending all the way down at Rainier Beach Playfield in South Seattle. It was specifically designed to be tackled in bite-sized chunks with plenty of scenery, treats, toilets, and Seattle landmarks along the way. The Seattle Urban Walk Committee hosts official walks, which you can find on the website, but it’s encouraged to go with friends on your own time. Personally, I’m trying to wrangle a group for a DIY 50k run of it this summer. (KATHLEEN TARRANT)

Scuba Dive to the Toilet off Alki

West Seattle

If you’re dive-certified (or endeavoring to become so), you should explore what’s known as the Alki Junkyard, a dive site full of critters and old appliances off the western end of Alki Beach. I’ll be honest, I haven’t actually seen this “toilet” with my own eyes, but my dad has (even if it was 50 years ago), and the mystery makes the murky depths all the more enticing, right? As any PNW diver will tell you, everything is covered in mud, and that’s on a good day. Think of it as a treasure hunt. The internet does confirm sightings of spot prawns, ratfish, squid, wolf eels, octopus, and big skates (which are fish similar in appearance to sting rays, not what Shawn Kemp wears to cruise down the boardwalk). (SHANNON LUBETICH)

Suck a Dick in Volunteer Park. For History’s Sake!

Capitol Hill

Should an earthquake destroy the city, there are some important historical locations and traditions that will need to be rebuilt. Nestled in the gayborhood of Capitol Hill, Volunteer Park features a landmark conservatory, a stunning view from a historic water tower, and a vibrant past of queers getting off in the bushes. The park was founded in 1876 and ever since, gays have been getting a mouthful behind the beautiful dahlias and taking it in from behind amongst the bursting rhododendrons. To be clear, I’m “not” telling you to commit any “acts of public indecency,” I’m just saying that if you’ve met your Grindr hookup in a shadowy shrub along the duck ponds, you’ve successfully contributed to an important oral history. (NICO SWENSON)

Look at how much more fun you can have with our 99 Things to Do checklist! Download yours here!

The Stranger

Welcome to Seattle! We’re all going to die.

by Megan Seling

Welcome to Seattle! We’re all going to die.

At least, that’s what they tell me.

Growing up in the Pacific Northwest, I’ve been hearing about “the Big One” my whole life. I was born two weeks after Mount St. Helens erupted on May 18, 1980 and thrown, naked and screaming, into a world still reeling from the catastrophic reminder that the Pacific Northwest is riddled with fault lines and active volcanos.

The fear was further embedded into my brain in elementary school, as we practiced earthquake drills more often than fire drills and took field trips to the mountain to stand in the aftermath of nature’s unapologetic power—while being told, “It will happen again.”

It’s not just the Northwest obsessed with the idea of the Big One, either. The whole world knows this corner of the country is fucked. In 2015, The New York Times published an article titled “The Really Big One,” a horrifically detailed 6,000-word description of the certain doom awaiting Washington the instant the Cascadia subduction zone—a 700-mile fault line that stretches from Vancouver Island, Canada to Cape Mendocino, California—snaps. The 9.1 magnitude earthquake will be the least of our worries, it turns out. A tsunami will form 42-foot waves in the Puget Sound and wash slices of civilization out to sea. Lahars, rivers of mud and debris capable of reaching hundreds of feet deep and traveling 45-50 miles per hour, will flow from Mount Rainier and obliterate everything in their path for miles. It’s not if, it’s when.

It’s really a shame, too, because Seattle is so fucking great! Sure, we here at The Stranger talk a lot of shit about this city—I mean, as we put this issue to bed, the cop-loving City Council is preparing to vote on whether or not to give the Seattle Police Department (which is under investigation for gender discrimination and sexual harassment) $96 million in back pay and raises just days after the Seattle School Board voted to possibly close 20 of Seattle’s 70 elementary schools for budgetary reasons (priorities!)—but flaws and inevitable extinction be damned, I love this city. And I want you to love it, too.

So, to ensure you experience the best possible version of Seattle, The Stranger’s writers compiled this list of 99 things you need to do to truly “get” Seattle. Whether you’re here for a weekend or a lifetime, I hope you’ll flip through this issue and feel inspired to get out there and explore, to find the coolest and weirdest and most surprising and delicious aspects of the city. You know, the stuff you’re really, really gonna miss when it’s all gone. Because it’s coming. The Big One? Any day now.

Megan Seling, Culture Editor

Attractions & Landmarks

Welcome to Our Weird Little Corner of the Country

Arts & Culture

Only in Seattle Can You Scream in a Museum and Dance to Robyn at Church

Food & Drink

The Best Side of Seattle Is Waiting for You at the Hot Dog Cart

Music & Nightlife

From Punk Shows at Roller Rinks to Trivia Nights Hosted By Jeopardy! Champs

Outdoors

Sure, the View Is Beautiful, but It’s Gonna Kill Us All

Shopping

Because You Can’t Take It With You

Extra Credit

Adventures That Require a Bit More Time, Money, and/or a Willing Grindr Date

The 99 Things to Do Checklist!

Download This Free PDF to Keep Track of Your Progress

The Stranger

We begin with euphoria and end in a depression.

by Charles Mudede

What a difference time makes. And yet, the story is always the same. We begin with euphoria and end in depression. In 1998, the Seattle Times celebrated (though with some reservations—it feared the 1997 Asian Financial crisis would spread to our region) the opening of Pacific Place. The mall was part of a $400 million revitalization project that included the relocation of Nordstrom, a sky bridge, and a new office building, all promising to transform the supposedly blighted urban core into a consumer magnet. “Pacific Place, [a] retail-cinema-restaurant complex,” wrote Seattle Times, “will add glitz and variety to downtown Seattle, [when it] opens Thursday at Sixth Avenue and Pine Street.”

A little more than 20 years after that blast of optimism, the same paper was unremittingly gloomy about the vertical mall’s future. It had just completed a long (two-and-a-half years) and disruptive renovation that left almost everyone cold. Though the mall’s new look seems “pristine,” wrote the Seattle Times in 2020, it’s “for the wrong reason: There are barely any stores.”

The owner of Pacific Place at the time was Madison Marquette. The Washington, D.C.-based real estate company purchased the property in 2014 for a whopping $271 million. A little later, it also bought the parking lot, which has more levels (six) than the building (five), for $87 million from the city. And so, more than $350 million was poured into Pacific Place. At the end of last week, on May 17, Puget Sound Business Journal reported the block-big and capital-losing mall (it only has about 15 tenants) had been sold to LA’s BH Properties. The price tag was, unlike the sale of 2014, kept under wraps. 

Pacific Place was doomed from the get-go, from the moment the idea of it was conceived by one of the founding members of Pine Street Development, Jeff Rhodes. The year was 1994. The plan was to think big. The belief was that the shock of a huge investment would restore the heart of downtown. The money for the plan came from many sources, including Kenny G, and the city provided the project with institutional support and a negative pick up on the massive parking lot. (Once the mall was fully operational, Mayor Norm Rice promised to buy and run the 1,200 subterranean parking units with the public’s purse.)

Ghost mall. CHARLES MUDEDE

But the developers, who claimed to have long experience in the business, made two huge miscalculations. Both were at a macro/social/historical level. One concerned the then-in-progress decline of the suburbs and the form of its culture (cars, malls, low density). The other concerned the rise of online retail, which, at the time, was still in its infancy. The former was a clear and present danger. The latter, admittedly, was still obscure, despite the dot-com bubble, which, after bursting in 2000, numbered Amazon as one of its survivors. But mall culture was already in trouble in the mid-1990s because a growing portion of the public saw its sea-sized parking lots, its simulation of community feeling, and its impersonal goods in a negative light. Even by the 1980s, suburban culture faced the rising and relentless criticism of new urbanism. By the 1990s, the anti-car and pro-density principles of this movement had reached the mainstream. And yet the developers decided to transpose the suburbs, whole hog, to exactly where many had moved to escape it. 

As if that wasn’t enough, the city devoted millions that could (should) have gone to affordable housing (increased density) to a parking lot that was so costly it became ammunition for the new urbanist cause. In the popular book Walkable City, Jeff Speck, using the research of parking professor Donald Shoup, pointed directly to the fact that Seattle had spent more than $60,000 for each stall below the mall. This was an extreme example of how the government subsidizes a large part of car culture. (Capitalism is never as cheap as it looks.) In fact, the city was ripped off when it purchased the parking garage. Seattle paid $73 million to own what cost $50 million to build, lost money maintaining the damn thing (“about $1.5 million a year“), and sold it for a song (only $87 million).

The parking lot is also said to have cost Mayor Norm Rice his chance at the big time, the Clinton Administration. He was the top runner for Secretary of Housing and Urban Development but was unceremoniously dropped when the vetting process likely revealed that he had directed HUD money to a project that was, in essence, for the rich and not the hard-working poor. Seattle Times of course called this interpretation of the fiasco a “cheap shot” in its 1996 article “Rice’s Loss Of Hud Job Is City Of Seattle’s Gain.” 

Even the architecture of the mall was out of time with the times. As the blogger for the Buildings of Seattle, Keith Cote, explained, its postmodern style was in the “death throes” by “the late 1990s.” Though Cote is “a huge fan” of this kind of architecture, its “later phase… especially when applied to shopping centers, often resembles a train wreck.” Cote is also amazed that “such a bloated design and creative bankruptcy came from such a prestigious firm as NBBJ.” (NBBJ is the Seattle-based firm that designed Amazon’s headquarters and the Spheres.)

Let’s now turn to Amazon and the decline of brick-and-mortar shopping. When Madison Marquette purchased Pacific Place for loads of money, Seattle was in the middle of an economic boom driven by the tech sector. Downtown’s property values were skyrocketing. The future looked ever so bright. The mall was “90 percent leased and anchored by Barnes & Noble and AMC Theatres.” But in 2017, Madison Marquette apparently got greedy. It wanted to attract the deep pockets of tech workers by renovating the mall’s interiors and cramming a brazenly bougie entrance into the southwest section of Pacific Place that directly faced the gateway to South Lake Union. When the disruptive project was finally completed in 2020 for lord knows how much, “two-thirds of the mall’s tenants” were history. And so, Madison Marquette saw the revenue stream of nearly full occupancy drop to a 21-tenant rivulet. “Barneys New York, Barnes and Noble, Victoria’s Secret, Brookstone, J. Crew” and more left during renovation. 

CHARLES MUDEDE

Then the pandemic hit, then the US economy lost a mind-boggling 22 million jobs, then the mall was directly hit by the Black Lives Matter revolt. Lululemon, the Canadian athletic apparel retailer offered a ray of hope. It moved into the mall in the winter of 2020. But a little more than two years later, it called it day. With this departure, KUOW wasted no time calling the Pacific Place a “Ghost Mall.” To make matters worse, one of its remaining tenants is called Ghost Gallery. Of the 10 or so times I visited the place in April and May, I never saw this gallery open once. The same goes for a number of other businesses on its second, third, and fourth floors, which at one point were to be converted into office spaces by a bold developer based in LA (the plan tanked in the fall of 2022). As for the celebrated European-style atrium, its inactivity and emptiness are only made more visible by the merciless light falling from the mall’s massive skylight.

Only the top floor has businesses (restaurants and a cinema) that attract customers. Indeed, the vertical mall has become something like a floating strip mall. When you look down from this busy level, you see lots of security guards, a few people heading up to where you are, bad art here and there, and a large amount of capital that’s “like a patient etherized upon the table.”

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