The Stranger’s morning news roundup.

by Ashley Nerbovig

Morning! Sunny day today, with temperatures expected to reach 68 degrees (so close). 

The gays ate garlic bread: On Monday night, about 100 people showed up at Meridian Park in Wallingford to eat garlic bread in a gathering of the gays. I chatted with Queen Anne resident Kairi, who organized the event, as she sat and watched episodes of Star Trek streaming on a projector. She said she’d put up posters advertising “gays eating garlic bread in the park” around her neighborhood in a “selfish endeavor” to find friends within walking distance of her place. The event blew up and attracted people from as far away as Bellingham. Kairi said she had no special love of garlic bread, she was just “talking to my therapist about what kind of event I would want to throw and this was the first thing that came to mind.” She plans to do more events in the future and hopefully return to the park next year for another garlic bread picnic.

Seattle City Council scheduled to vote on two new labor contracts: At 2 pm today the council is set to vote on two new labor contracts; one covers most city employees, and one covers only the officers and sergeants of the Seattle Police Department. At a council meeting yesterday, Council Member Tammy Morales asked to delay the vote on the Seattle Police Officers Guild contract since the council has held ZERO public hearings on it. Nelson said no because doing so could delay the back pay and raises for officers until the fall. As Hannah pointed out yesterday, Nelson normally has no problem screwing over city workers by delaying back pay. Anyway, meeting starts at 2 pm at City Hall. 

But its fine when it happens to literally every other City worker!https://t.co/0mk5XsL3vZ https://t.co/adSFg32eHj

— Hannah Krieg (@hannahkrieg) May 13, 2024

The Three Bobby Problem has been averted: After Washington Attorney General Bob Ferguson urged the other two Bob Fergusons in the governor’s race to drop out or potentially face felony charges, the cowards withdrew Monday evening. The two candidates appeared to be attempting to confuse voters and to draw votes away from AG Ferguson, who’s the Democratic frontrunner in the primary. The other Fergusons maintain they held genuine interest in running for the top executive job in the state. The Bob Ferguson out of Yakima told the Seattle Times “his ‘dream’ had been ‘destroyed.'” 

The extra Bobs have withdrawn pic.twitter.com/DprDo9LHjT

— Ashley Nerbovig (@AshleyNerbovig) May 14, 2024

Everyone HATES Mayor Bruce Harrell’s housing plan: Even the Chamber of Commerce says Harrell really fucked up Seattle’s Comprehensive Plan. The Chamber joined with about four dozen other organizations to tell Harrell he’s on track to exacerbate Seattle’s housing crisis, according to CascadePBS (formerly known by the somewhat cooler name of Crosscut.) But the Chamber clearly just doesn’t understand Harrell’s vision the way I do. We don’t need all of that housing if we just put the poorest people in a jail in Des Moines. Space Needle thinking, people! 

Speaking of people who want to put the poors in jail: Seattle Times Publisher and CEO Frank Blethen plans to step down in 2025. Blethen was remembered in his own paper for shooting his neighbor’s dog with a pellet gun and for boarding up and erecting “wire fences around company headquarters” after his employees went on strike in 2000. Some may see the Times’ ability to mention that in the paper as a mark of the paper’s commitment to editorial independence, but really its just a reminder that the rich don’t care what you say about them as long as they can retire to Mercer Island and enjoy their favorite past times. [Eds note: To quote a wise man, “Fuck you to death.”]

Mercer Island dog shooter Frank Blethen to step down from job he inherited https://t.co/t5wg1eXQt6

— DivestSPD (@DivestSPD) May 13, 2024

Suspect in Capitol Hill Station stabbing arrested: US Marshals arrested a 26-year-old man in connection to the stabbing death of a 37-year-old chef who worked at Harry’s Fine Foods in Capitol Hill. The restaurant remained closed Monday as the business works to support staff after the loss, according to MyNorthwest.

Michael Cohen testifies against Donald Trump: Cohen went up on the stand yesterday and said all the stuff we expected him to say about how Trump paid him the money Cohen needed to kill the Stormy Daniels story. This morning, though, he said he lied to Congress when he testified in 2017 about the Trump Tower Moscow real estate project, according to CNN. Lol, the live updates from CNN right now are just more updates about stuff Cohen has lied about in the past. People need to stop calling this guy to testify, he’s too honest about how dishonest he is.

Biden Administration continues to monitor Rafah: Israeli troop movements appear to signal that Israeli Defense Forces (IDF) plan to invade Rafah soon, but the US hasn’t formally assessed “whether a full-scale invasion is imminent,” according to NBCNews. The US has warned Israel against such an invasion. Meanwhile, Israeli forces pushed deeper into Rafah on Monday.

Bikini Kill’s Kathleen Hanna wrote a book: The pacific northwest’s own Kathleen Hanna, a prominent figure in the riot grrrl movement that positioned itself against a culture of misogyny, wrote a book, Rebel Girl, which shares the same name as Bikini Kill’s most famous song, “Rebel Girl.” Hanna sat down with the Guardian to talk about it. Enjoy the anthem of my girl-on-girl fantasies. 

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